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Nowadays, technology is becoming more easy-accessible and advanced.

Nowadays, technology is becoming more easy-accessible and advanced. m1XAr
Nowadays, technology is becoming more easy-accessible and advanced. People's choice of transportation has changed accordingly. In 1990, people tended to on foot, but in 2010, people favour using vehicles to commute. In 1990, the most commonly-chosen mean for kids aged between 5 to 12 to commute to and from school was by walking. More than 12 million trips were done by travelling on foot. There were also other means of travelling, although not as popular walking, including passenger car, cycling, walking and bus or bus. Over 3 million trips were by the former, while each of the 3 other means each made 6 million trips possible. 20 years later, in 2010, the most popular mode of transport has become commuting by passenger car, which was the least-favoured option two decades ago. More than 11 million travel from home to school were by private cars. On the other hand, the other four choices, namely walking, cycling, walking and bus and bus, has shown a decreased trend in popularity. Numbers of trips made by these means are recorded to be around 6 million, 2 million, 3 million and 5 million respectively. Cycling has become a way to commute which least people prefer. To conclude, people's choice differs over time because of changes in society. For instance, technological advancement and a more wealthy society are some of the reasons for taking passenger cars to become a new trend. As a result, commuting on foot has been made less necessary and less favoured, and so as travelling by bike or public transport.
Nowadays, technology is becoming more easy-accessible and advanced.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
's choice of transportation has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
accordingly
. In 1990,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tended to on foot,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in 2010,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
using vehicles to commute.

In 1990, the most
commonly
-chosen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mean
for kids aged
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 5 and 12".
between 5 to 12
to
Possible agreement error. The noun 'commute' seems to be countable, so consider using: "commutes".
commute
to and from school was by walking. More than 12
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million
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trips
were done
by travelling on foot. There were
also
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other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
means
of travelling, although not as popular walking, including passenger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
, cycling, walking and bus or bus. Over 3
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trips
were by the former, while each of the 3
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
means
each made 6
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million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trips
possible.

20 years later, in 2010, the most popular mode of transport has become commuting by passenger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
, which was the
Possible spelling mistake found.
least-favoured
option two decades ago. More than 11
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
travel from home to school were by private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
four choices,
namely
walking, cycling, walking and bus and bus, has shown a decreased trend in popularity. Numbers of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trips
made by these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
means
are recorded
to be around 6
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million
, 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
, 3
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
and 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
respectively
. Cycling has become a way to commute which
A determiner is probably missing here: "the least".
least
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer.

To conclude
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's choice differs over time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in society.
For instance
, technological advancement and a more wealthy society are
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
reasons for taking passenger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
to become a new trend.
As a result
, commuting on foot has
been made
less necessary and less
Possible spelling mistake. 'favoured' is British English.
favoured
, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
as travelling by bike or public transport.
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IELTS academic Nowadays, technology is becoming more easy-accessible and advanced.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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