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Mony peop,e c,re ofuoid lo leove lheir home becouse of crime. Some believe lhol more oclion should be foken lo prevenl crime. While olhels feet lhot liftle oclion con be done fo sfop crime. Discuss ond give YOU| YieW?

Mony peop, e c, re ofuoid lo leove lheir home becouse of crime. Some believe lhol more oclion should be foken lo prevenl crime. While olhels feet lhot liftle oclion con be done fo sfop crime. Discuss ond give YOU| YieW? aN9G
The table compares the percentages of people using different functions of their mobile phones between 2006 and 2010. ͒ Throughout the period shown, the main reason why people used their mobile phones was to make calls. However, there was a marked increase in the popularity of other mobile phone features, particularly the Internet search feature. In 2006, 100% of mobile phone owners used their phones to make calls, while the next most popular functions were text messaging (73%) and taking photos (66%). By contrast, less than 20% of owners played games or music on their phones, and there were no figures for users doing Internet searches or recording video. Over the following 4 years, there was relatively little change in the figures for the top three mobile phone features. However, the percentage of people using their phones to access the Internet jumped to 41% in 2008 and then to 73% in 2010. There was also a significant rise in the use of mobiles to play games and to record video, with figures reaching 41% and 35% respectively in 2010.
The table compares the percentages of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
using
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
functions of their

mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
between 2006 and 2010. ͒

Throughout the period shown, the main reason why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
their mobile phones

was to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
calls.
However
, there was a marked increase in the popularity of other

mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
features,
particularly
the Internet search feature.

In 2006, 100% of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
owners
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
calls, while the

next
most popular functions were text messaging (73%) and taking photos (66%). By

contrast, less than 20% of owners played games or music on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
, and there

were no figures for users doing Internet searches or recording video.

Over the following 4 years, there was
relatively
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the figures for the top

three mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
features.
However
, the percentage of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
using their phones

to access the Internet jumped to 41% in 2008 and then to 73% in 2010. There was

also
a significant rise in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of mobiles to play games and to record video, with

figures reaching 41% and 35%
respectively
in 2010.

IELTS academic Mony peop, e c, re ofuoid lo leove lheir home becouse of crime. Some believe lhol more oclion should be foken lo prevenl crime. While olhels feet lhot liftle oclion con be done fo sfop crime. Discuss ond give YOU| YieW?

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
179 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Mony peop,e c,re ofuoid lo leove lheir home becouse of crime. Some believe lhol more oclion should be foken lo prevenl crime. While olhels feet lhot liftle oclion con be done fo sfop crime. Discuss ond give YOU| YieW?