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Meat and fish consumption in a European country

Meat and fish consumption in a European country n179g
The line graph illustrates that the consuming rate of meat and fish in European country from 1979 to 2004. Overall, the consumption rate of chicken was an upward trend whereas the downward trends can be seen in the other three meals (Beef Lamb and Fish). The pattern of chicken consumption was the highest over the period of time. In 1979, beef consumption was accounted for well above 200 grams per person per week, which was higher consuming rate than those in other different meals (slightly under 150, 150 and just above 50 grams per person per week respectively). After that, there was a decrease pattern of beef with some fluctuations to just above 100 grams per week in 2004. On the other hand, there was a remarkable rise in the pattern for chicken to 250 grams in 2004. In terms of Lamb and fish, the patterns for both were shown in the graph as a marginal decrease. The consuming rate of lamb began at 150 grams per person per week in 1979, after which it descended dramatically to just above 50 grams per person per week in the last year. The similar trend can be experienced in the case of fish consumption that went down steadily from just above 50 grams per person per week in 19979 to 50 grams in 2004.
The line graph illustrates that the consuming
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rate
of meat and fish in European country from 1979 to 2004.

Overall
, the
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consumption
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of chicken was an upward trend whereas the downward trends can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the other three meals (Beef Lamb and Fish). The
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pattern
of chicken
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consumption
was the highest over the period of time.

In 1979, beef
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consumption
was accounted
for well
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above
200
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grams
per
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person
per
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week
, which was higher consuming
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rate
than those in other
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different
meals (
slightly
under 150, 150 and
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just
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above
50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
respectively
). After that, there was a decrease
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pattern
of beef with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fluctuations to
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just
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above
100
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grams
per
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week
in 2004.
On the other hand
, there was a remarkable rise in the
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pattern
for chicken to 250
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grams
in 2004.

In terms of Lamb and fish, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patterns
for both
were shown
in the graph as a marginal decrease. The consuming
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rate
of lamb began at 150
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
in 1979, after which it descended
dramatically
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
above
50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
in the last year. The similar trend can
be experienced
in the case of fish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
that went down
steadily
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
above
50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
in 19979 to 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
in 2004.

IELTS academic Meat and fish consumption in a European country

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
222 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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