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marriage and divorce from 1970 to 2000

marriage and divorce from 1970 to 2000 gAanO
The given bar chart presents information about USA marriage and divorce from 1970 to 2000. Eventhough the number of marriages was stay unchanged for two years 1970 and 1980), but it faced to rapid change in futher two years 1980 (just over 2 million) and 2000 (2 million marriages). But divorces rate is showing upward trend. The divorce rate was 1 million in 1970, and it has since risen to little about 1. 5 million. However, the figure has returned to the same level as it was in 2000 (1 million). While, in terms of American adult material status, adult marriage is greater than the other three material statuses in both 1970 and 2000. But, the marriage rate in 1970 was significantly greater than the rate in 2000. Surprisingly, the proportion of divorced people in the year 2000 was nearly double that of 1970. That's a jump from little over 3% in 1970 to 6% in 2000. While the proportions of never married and widowed individuals are nearly identical, there are minor variations. Eventhough, the propotion of marriges has drop through the time, it is still greater than the divorce rate in the USA. While, with the exception of a minor dip in 2000, American adults married in greater numbers in both years.
The
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given
bar chart presents information about USA
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marriage
and
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divorce
from 1970 to

2000.

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Eventhough
the number of
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marriages
was stay unchanged for two years 1970 and 1980
Unpaired symbol: '(' seems to be missing
)
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it faced to rapid
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
futher
two years 1980 (
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 2
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million)
and 2000
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(2 million
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marriages)
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
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divorces
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rate
is showing upward trend. The
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divorce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
was
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1 million
in 1970, and it has since risen to
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little
about 1. 5
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million
.
However
, the figure has

returned to the same level as it was in 2000 (1
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million)
. While, in terms of American

adult material status, adult
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marriage
is greater than the other three material statuses in

both 1970 and 2000.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
in 1970 was
significantly
greater than the

rate in 2000.
Surprisingly
, the proportion of divorced
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the
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year
2000 was
nearly


double that of 1970. That's a jump from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
over 3% in 1970 to 6% in 2000. While the

proportions of never married and widowed individuals are
nearly
identical, there are

minor variations.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Eventhough
, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
propotion
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
marriges
has drop through the time, it is
still
greater than

the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
divorce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
in the USA. While,
Consider using "except" or "except for"
with the exception of
a minor dip in 2000, American

adults married in greater numbers in both years.
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IELTS academic marriage and divorce from 1970 to 2000

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
213 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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