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Line graph provided reveals the data about the amount of annual visits to Australia by overseas residents

Line graph provided reveals the data about the amount of annual visits to Australia by overseas residents 6Gy8
A glance at the line graph provided reveals the information about the amount of annual visits to Australia by abroad residents. Overall, it is clear that Australia witnessed a noticeable increase in the number of visitors between 1975 and 2005. There was a gradual rise in the number of visitors, which stood at 20 million per year in 1975. while the figure showed at around 25 millions in 1985. Then the indicator indicate 30 millions tourists in 1995. 2005 saw a dramatic growth in the number of annual visitors to Australia. It is worth noticing that the most significant growth in the number of travellers to Australia from different countries. Australia received the highest number of tourists from these countries during the period.
A glance at the line graph provided reveals the information about the amount of annual visits to Australia by abroad residents.
Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that Australia witnessed a noticeable increase in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of visitors between 1975 and 2005. There was a gradual rise in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of visitors, which stood at 20 million per year in 1975.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
while
the figure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
at around 25 millions in 1985. Then the indicator indicate 30 millions tourists in 1995. 2005
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a dramatic growth in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of annual visitors to Australia. It is worth noticing that the most significant growth in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
to Australia from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries. Australia received the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of tourists from these countries during the period.

IELTS academic Line graph provided reveals the data about the amount of annual visits to Australia by overseas residents

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
123 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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