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In terms of the gender distribution, men outnumbered women in all years except 1861, when there were 131,780 men as compared to 160,000 women. By 1901, the gap between the genders too had narrowed substantially (31,000 men and 30,000 women). Finally, the total number of factories showed a fluctuating trend. There were 225 factories in Britain and Wales in 1851. This number surged to 721 in 1881 and then dropped to 600 by 1901.

In terms of the gender distribution, men outnumbered women in all years except 1861, when there were 131, 780 men as compared to 160, 000 women. By 1901, the gap between the genders too had narrowed substantially (31, 000 men and 30, 000 women). Finally, the total number of factories showed a fluctuating trend. There were 225 factories in Britain and Wales in 1851. This number surged to 721 in 1881 and then dropped to 600 by 1901. X7w5E
The given table illustrates the figures for male and female workers, and manufacturing units in England and Wales in 10 year intervals starting from 1851 to 1901. Overall, the number of factory workers dropped steadily throughout the given period and males outnumbered females in most years. Moreover, the number of factories saw a fluctuating trend in England and Wales. Looking at the table in more detail, there were 477, 100 employees in British and Welsh factories in 1851. However by 1901, this number had plummeted to just 61, 000, registering a drop each year. In terms of the gender distribution, men outnumbered women in all years except 1861, when there were 131, 780 men as compared to 160, 000 women. By 1901, the gap between the genders too had narrowed substantially (31, 000 men and 30, 000 women). Finally, the total number of factories showed a fluctuating trend. There were 225 factories in Britain and Wales in 1851. This number surged to 721 in 1881 and then dropped to 600 by 1901.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
table illustrates the figures for male and female workers, and manufacturing units in England and Wales in 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
intervals starting from 1851 to 1901.

Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factory
workers dropped
steadily
throughout the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period and males outnumbered females in most years.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factories
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a fluctuating trend in England and Wales.

Looking at the table in more detail, there were 477, 100 employees in British and Welsh
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factories
in 1851.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
by 1901, this
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number
had plummeted to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
61, 000, registering a drop each
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year
. In terms of the gender distribution,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
outnumbered women in all years except 1861, when there were 131, 780
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
as compared to 160, 000 women. By 1901, the gap between the genders too had narrowed
substantially
(31, 000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and 30, 000 women).

Finally
, the total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factories
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a fluctuating trend. There were 225
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factories
in Britain and Wales in 1851. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
surged to 721 in 1881 and then dropped to 600 by 1901.

IELTS academic In terms of the gender distribution, men outnumbered women in all years except 1861, when there were 131, 780 men as compared to 160, 000 women. By 1901, the gap between the genders too had narrowed substantially (31, 000 men and 30, 000 women). Finally, the total number of factories showed a fluctuating trend. There were 225 factories in Britain and Wales in 1851. This number surged to 721 in 1881 and then dropped to 600 by 1901.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
172 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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  • In terms of the gender distribution, men outnumbered women in all years except 1861, when there were 131,780 men as compared to 160,000 women. By 1901, the gap between the genders too had narrowed substantially (31,000 men and 30,000 women). Finally, the total number of factories showed a fluctuating trend. There were 225 factories in Britain and Wales in 1851. This number surged to 721 in 1881 and then dropped to 600 by 1901.