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Ielts task one writing chart

Ielts task one writing chart obWP3
Chart given depicts the global trades in billion of various kinds of digital games such as Mobile phone games, online games, console games and handheld games since the year 2000 till 2006. Broadly speaking, in the span of first two years i. e. 2000 and 2001, deals of mobile phone games were zero it was 2002 when it's sales started coming in picture on the contrary handheld games were the most popular ones also earned much greater amount that any of the other games. Year 2000 saw sales of handheld games around 11 billion which then increased significantly to 18 billion in the end period(2006) whereas console games kept on decreasing in sales throughout the given span, where it generated six billion in sales in the first year and went on to reduce till two billion. Online games only came in existence in the second year of given span from there on sales of it only skyrocketed, it was seen to produce one billion in debut year which then rose to 10 billion in the end, while Mobile phone games' inception took time and came a year later than online games and since then it has only seen the significant growth till the end of the period.
Chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
depicts the global trades in
Use "a billion" or use a number before 'billion'.
billion
of various kinds of digital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
such as Mobile phone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
, online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
, console
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and handheld
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
since the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2000 till 2006.

Broadly
speaking, in the span of
first
two years
There should be no space here: "i.e.".
i. e.
2000 and 2001, deals of mobile phone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
were zero it was 2002 when it's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
coming in picture
on the contrary
handheld
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
were the most popular ones
also
earned much greater amount that any of the other games.

Year 2000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of handheld
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
around 11
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
which then increased
significantly
to 18
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
period(2006) whereas console
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
on decreasing in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
throughout the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
span, where it generated six
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
in the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
and went on to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
till two billion.

Online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
came in existence in the second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
span from there on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
skyrocketed, it was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
to produce one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in debut
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
which then rose to 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, while Mobile phone games' inception took time and came a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
later than online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and since then it has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
the significant growth till the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period.
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IELTS academic Ielts task one writing chart

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
207 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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