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Holiday accomodations in British Countries

Holiday accomodations in British Countries gqgBO
The bar chart depicts the kinds of holiday accommodations in four different British nations in 2010. In the y-axis the four kinds of accommodations are putted, while in the y-axis we see the percentages. Overall, it’s noticeable that hotel is the most common placement for the four countries considered in the chart, meaning not less than 40% in any one of them. On the other hand, camping and caravan are usually the less chosen alternatives. In England, hotel represents something about 55% of the accommodations, while self-catering, the second mostly used, is considered by about 27% of guests in the country. In Scotland, hotel represents about 52%, and self-catering has more representativity than in England, achieving 30%. In Wales, hotel means about 49% of the types of accommodation chosen by tourists, and self-catering, as in England, represents something about 27%; In Northern Ireland it’s noticeable that Caravan has a higher representativity than in the other three countries, been occupied by about 31% of visitors, but, as usual, hotel keeps as the more used alternative, representing about 45%.
The bar chart depicts the kinds of holiday accommodations in four
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
British nations in 2010. In the y-axis the four kinds of accommodations
are putted
, while in the y-axis we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the percentages.

Overall
, it’s noticeable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
is the most common placement for the four countries considered in the chart, meaning not less than 40% in any one of them.
On the other hand
, camping and caravan are
usually
the less chosen alternatives.

In England,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
represents something about 55% of the accommodations, while self-catering, the second
mostly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
,
is considered
by about 27% of guests in the country. In Scotland,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
represents about 52%, and self-catering has more representativity than in England, achieving 30%.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
Wales,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
means about 49% of the types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accommodation
chosen by tourists, and self-catering, as in England, represents something about 27%; In Northern Ireland it’s noticeable that Caravan has a higher representativity than in the other three countries,
been occupied
by about 31% of visitors,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, as usual,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
as the more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
alternative, representing about 45%.
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IELTS academic Holiday accomodations in British Countries

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
177 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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