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he given maps depicts the changes occurred in entrance of roads to the hospital in the year 2007 and 2010.

he given maps depicts the changes occurred in entrance of roads to the hospital in the year 2007 and 2010. Mlo39
The given maps depicts the changes occurred in entrance of roads to the hospital in the year 2007 and 2010. Overall, there are not many changes in the maps except the construction of roundabouts, bus station, and a parking area. To begin with, surrounding the hospital is the ring road, which was connected to the city road by hospital road. By 2010, two roundabouts had been added at the ends of the hospital road where one roundabout connects through the ring road while, the other connects to the city road. Furthermore, in 2007, there was single car park for both the staff and the public, which by 2010, got converted into a staff parking only and a seperated area has been alloted to the public parking in the east side of the ring road. The bus stop at the two sides of hospital road were replaced by a large bus stand which is connected with the two roundabouts directly.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
maps depicts the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
occurred in entrance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
in the year 2007 and 2010.

Overall
, there are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the maps except the construction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roundabouts
, bus station, and a parking area.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, surrounding the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
is the ring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
, which
was connected
to the city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
. By 2010, two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roundabouts
had been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
at the ends of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
where one roundabout connects through the ring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
while, the other connects to the city road.

Furthermore
, in 2007, there was single car park for both the staff and the public, which by 2010,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
converted into a staff parking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
and a
Possible spelling mistake found.
seperated
area has been
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "allotted", the past tense form of the verb 'allot'?
alloted
to the public parking in the east side of the ring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
. The bus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
at the two sides of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
were replaced
by a large bus stand which
is connected
with the two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roundabouts
directly
.

IELTS academic he given maps depicts the changes occurred in entrance of roads to the hospital in the year 2007 and 2010.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
159 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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