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Graph A show trends in 2 activities in Britain

Graph A show trends in 2 activities in Britain q6JnP
The diagram B provides information about cigarette smoking between male and female. Activity X is male and activity Y is female. The vertical axis represents percentage and the horizontal axis represents period from 1974 to 2007. In 1974, female smokes cigarette less than male, just 40%. But the percentage of male reaches 50%. From 1978 to 1982, The figure is going down significantly. The proportion of male smoking cigarette is from 41% to 45%. Besides that, female smokes cigarette is from 32% to 36%. From 1900 to 1995, the percentage decreases sharply. Female and male smoke less than the first year. The figure of male is 31% and female is about 28%. From 2002 to 2007, It continues reducing. Specially, The proportion is reducing more than in 1995. Female is about 19% and male is about 21%. Overall, Much larger percentage of male smokes cigarette in comparison to female.
The diagram B provides information about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cigarette
smoking between male and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
. Activity X is male and activity Y is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
. The vertical axis represents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
and the horizontal axis represents period from 1974 to 2007. In 1974,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smokes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cigarette
less than male,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
40%.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of male reaches 50%. From 1978 to 1982, The figure is going down
significantly
. The proportion of male smoking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cigarette
is from 41% to 45%.
Besides
that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smokes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cigarette
is from 32% to 36%. From 1900 to 1995, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
decreases
sharply
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Female
and male
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
less than the
first
year. The figure of male is 31% and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
is about 28%. From 2002 to 2007, It continues reducing.
Specially
, The proportion is reducing more than in 1995.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Female
is about 19% and male is about 21%.
Overall
, Much larger
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percentage
of male
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "smokes'" or "smoke's"?
smokes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cigarette
in comparison
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
.
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IELTS academic Graph A show trends in 2 activities in Britain

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
149 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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