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following bar chat shows that,number of women and mens future eduction in britain in three time periods. analysis the chart

following bar chat shows that, number of women and mens future eduction in britain in three time periods. analysis the chart YwLmm
This bar chart illustrates the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three time periods and whether they were studying full time or part-time. Those their periods are 1970, 1980 and 1990. According to the data revealed in this bar chart, if we look at women first, it appears that the highest number of women in full-time education is 1100 women. It happened in the 1990s. Also when we look at men’s, it appears that the most full-time study activity was in the 1970s. It’s a 1000 men’s. A comparison of men's and women's full-time education in 1980/81 shows that a similar number of men and women received full-time education. Further analysis of this graph shows, less number of full-time education has women in 1970. That is the overall less full-time education amount of this chart Also, looking at this chart reveals that the main thing that is fewer people are getting part-time education than those who are getting full-time education. In the 1970s, there were girls who had the least full-time education, and there were girls who had the least part-time education. Finally, the lowest number of men in part-time is in the year 1970s.
This bar chart illustrates the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
in
further
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in Britain in three time periods and whether they were studying full time or part-time.
A determiner cannot combine with a possessive pronoun. Did you mean simply "their periods" or "Those periods"?
Those their periods
are 1970, 1980 and 1990.

According to the data revealed in this bar chart, if we look at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
first
, it appears that the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
in full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is 1100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
. It happened in the 1990s.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
when we look at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men’s
, it appears that the most full-time study activity was in the 1970s. It’s a 1000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men’s
. A comparison of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
's and women's full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in 1980/81
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that a similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
received full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
Further
analysis of this graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
, less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
in 1970.
That is
the
overall
less full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
amount of this chart

Also
, looking at this chart reveals that the main thing
that is
fewer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are getting part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
than those who are getting full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. In the 1970s, there were girls who had the least full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, and there were girls who had the least part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
Finally
, the lowest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
in part-time is in the year 1970s.
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IELTS academic following bar chat shows that, number of women and mens future eduction in britain in three time periods. analysis the chart

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
200 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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