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Fast food eating habits in USA

Fast food eating habits in USA 967yX
The indicated bar chart illustrates the amount of time in which American residents frequented fast food restaurants in several years, 2003, 2006 and 2013. Overall, the two largest groups were those that went once a week and those that went once or twice a week. The smallest proportion however, were those that went daily and those that never went. It is apparent that the majority of Americans (25% to 35%), regardless of the year (2003, 2006 or 2013) would visit fast food restaurants anywhere from once a week to twice a month. While a comparatively moderate amount of US citizens (15% to 20%) would either visit several times a week or only a few times a year. There is also a small contingent of Americans (3% to 5%) who have the drastically different tendencies where they would either go to fast food restaurants daily or that they would never frequent them.
The indicated bar chart illustrates the amount of time in which American residents frequented
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food restaurants in several years, 2003, 2006 and 2013.
Overall
, the two largest groups were those that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
once a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
and those that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
once or twice a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
. The smallest proportion
however
, were those that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
daily and those that never
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
. It is apparent that the majority of Americans (25% to 35%), regardless of the year (2003, 2006 or 2013) would visit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food restaurants anywhere from once a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
to twice a month. While a
comparatively
moderate amount of US citizens (15% to 20%) would either visit several times a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a few times a year. There is
also
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
contingent of Americans (3% to 5%) who have the
drastically
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
tendencies where they would either go to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food restaurants daily or that they would never frequent them.
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IELTS academic Fast food eating habits in USA

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
151 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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