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Export earnings of five categories

Export earnings of five categories xgEpg
The bar chart and table give information about a country’s export earnings from five groups of products in 2015 and 2016. It is noticeable that export revenues in all but one of the five product categories increased over the period shown. While petroleum products were the highest earning exports in both years, the textile industry saw the most significant growth in earnings. Export earnings from petroleum products rose from around $61 billion in 2015 to $63 billion in 2016, which was an increase of 3%. Income from engineered goods reached a similar level. The country’s export earnings from these goods went up by 8. 5% to approximately $62 billion in 2016. From 2015 to 2016, there was a 15. 24% increase in export revenue from textiles, with earnings rising from roughly $25 billion to over $30 billion. By contrast, there was almost no change in the amount of money earned from agricultural products, which remained at just over $30 billion. Finally, the only decline in income occurred in the gems and jewellery product group, where export earnings fell by around 5% to approximately $40 billion in 2016.
The bar chart and table give information about a country’s
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export
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earnings
from five groups of
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products
in 2015 and 2016.

It is noticeable that
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export
revenues in all
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but
one of the five
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product
categories increased over the period shown. While petroleum
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products
were the highest
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earning
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exports
in both years, the textile industry
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
the most significant growth in earnings.

Export
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earnings
from petroleum
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products
rose from around $61
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billion
in 2015 to $63
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billion
in 2016, which was an increase of 3%. Income from engineered
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goods
reached a similar level. The country’s
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export
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earnings
from these
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goods
went up by 8. 5% to approximately $62
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billion
in 2016.

From 2015 to 2016, there was a 15. 24% increase in
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export
revenue from textiles, with
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earnings
rising from roughly $25
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billion
to over $30
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billion
. By contrast, there was almost no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the amount of money earned from agricultural
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products
, which remained at
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just
over $30
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billion
.
Finally
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
decline in income occurred in the gems and
Possible spelling mistake. 'jewellery' is British English.
jewellery
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product
group, where
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export
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earnings
fell by around 5% to approximately $40
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in 2016.
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IELTS academic Export earnings of five categories

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
187 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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