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Explain the chart below. UK phones call

Explain the chart below. UK phones call q0jNw
By increasing technology, mobiles, the most useful communication device, have been so popular among people all around the world. As you can see in the chart below, UK people had a significant progress in utilizing mobile as a communication tool, between 1995 and 2002. This progress began by devising new brand and novel types of cellphones. At the beginning, mobiles were not so famous between UK citizens. Hens, the prime device for communication was ordinary phones, and just local calls were prevalent. Between 1995 and 1999, we had an ascendant increase in using phones. But after this time, we had a descendant decrease in using this stuff. It all mention the branding development in cellphone industry. Also, by increasing in rate of migration to abroad, national and international calls had been spread. To sum up, we had a hug development in using cellphones for social purposes. Also, international calls became expanded among individuals.
By increasing technology, mobiles, the most useful communication device, have been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
popular among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
all around the world. As you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
in the chart below, UK
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
had
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "significant progress".
a significant progress
in utilizing mobile as a communication tool, between 1995 and 2002. This progress began by devising new brand and novel types of cellphones.

At the beginning, mobiles were not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
between UK citizens. Hens, the prime device for communication was ordinary phones, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
local calls were prevalent. Between 1995 and 1999, we had an ascendant increase in using phones.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
after this time, we had a descendant decrease in using this stuff. It all mention the branding development in cellphone industry.
Also
, by increasing in rate of migration to abroad, national and international calls had
been spread
.

To sum up, we had a hug development in using cellphones for social purposes.
Also
, international calls became expanded among individuals.
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IELTS academic Explain the chart below. UK phones call

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
153 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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