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emperor penguin extension

emperor penguin extension R0AVP
Aptenodytes forsteri, also known as the emperor penguin, is one of the cutest animals on the planet. But nowadays, about 2/3 of the current 45 emperor penguin populations are at risk of a decline of more than 50%, and about 1/5 of the population faces "near extinction". Why are they in danger? Firstly, habitat destruction is the primary driver of global biodiversity loss, and therefore reducing or reversing habitat loss is a critical goal of emperor penguin conservation. Secondly, as the number of fish species declines significantly, the food chain is also adversely affected, which might lead to the extinction of emperor penguins. Thirdly emperor penguins cannot find anywhere else to live, this would put them at a higher risk of extinction. Finally, many people believe that there is no point in protecting emperor penguins from extinction as it is a process that occurs naturally. But in my opinion, it is not a natural process, but rather human activities that push emperor penguins to the verge of extinction. So I will donate 5 euros and propagate the penguin protection movement hope it will revive everyone's sense of responsibility.
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Aptenodytes
Possible spelling mistake found.
forsteri
,
also
known as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emperor
penguin, is one of the cutest animals on the planet.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
nowadays, about 2/3 of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
45
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emperor
penguin populations are at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of a decline of more than 50%, and about 1/5 of the population faces
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
near extinction
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
. Why are they in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
?
Firstly
, habitat destruction is the primary driver of global biodiversity loss, and
therefore
reducing or reversing habitat loss is a critical goal of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emperor
penguin conservation.
Secondly
, as the number of fish species declines
significantly
, the food chain is
also
adversely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
, which might lead to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emperor
penguins.
Thirdly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emperor
penguins cannot find anywhere else to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
, this would put them at a higher
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
.
Finally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that there is no point in protecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emperor
penguins from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
as it is a process that occurs
naturally
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in my opinion, it is not a natural process,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
rather
human activities that push
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emperor
penguins to the verge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I will donate 5 euros and propagate the penguin protection movement hope it will revive everyone's sense of responsibility.
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IELTS academic emperor penguin extension

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
188 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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