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Electricity production by fuel in Australia and France from 1980 to 2000

Electricity production by fuel in Australia and France from 1980 to 2000 qLqwD
The charts illustrate the proportion of electricity production by power resources in Australia and France between 1980 and 2000. Overall, the all time most significant sources of fuel in Australia was Coal, while in France the main source of fuel changed in to Nuclear power. To begin, from 1980 to 2000, Australia added over 60 units to produce electricity. In 1980, 50% of electricity were produced by coal compared to year 2000, the usage of coal power were raised over the half. The natural gas and oil downed and left only 2 units, while previously used almost a fifth of all units. Hydro power which generated electricity stood at 20% and had slightly growing for over a third in meantime. Units of electricity by fuel source in France were also expanded which been doubled into 180 units. In 1980, coal and natural gas were citied have the same amount proportion of power resources stood at one quarter of 90 units. But, in the following years natural gas was cut to small amount of generator. Nuclear power represented as the favorable resources which had more than 126 units of electricity resources, however in the prior year, it only took slightly more than one fifth from total units. Oil production which accounted for 20 units, had constructed 5 new units in 2000. For an exception, coal industry to generate power had not been changing over the period given.
The charts illustrate the proportion of
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electricity
production by
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power
resources in Australia and France between 1980 and 2000.
Overall
, the
It appears that a hyphen is missing in the adjective "all-time"
all time
most significant sources of fuel in Australia was Coal, while in France the main source of fuel
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changed
in to Nuclear power.

To
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begin
, from 1980 to 2000, Australia
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added
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over
60
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units
to produce
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electricity
. In 1980, 50% of
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electricity
were produced
by coal compared to year 2000, the usage of coal
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power
were raised
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over
the half. The natural gas and oil downed and
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left
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
2
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units
, while previously
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
almost a fifth of all
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units
. Hydro
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power
which generated
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electricity
stood at 20% and had
slightly
growing for
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over
a third in meantime.

Units of
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electricity
by fuel source in France were
also
expanded which
been doubled
into 180
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units
. In 1980, coal and natural gas were
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citied
have the same amount proportion of
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power
resources stood at one quarter of 90
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units
.
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But
, in the following years natural gas was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
to
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small
amount of generator. Nuclear
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power
represented as the favorable resources which had more than 126
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units
of
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electricity
resources,
however
in the prior year, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
took
slightly
more than one fifth from total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
units
. Oil production which accounted for 20
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units
, had constructed 5 new
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units
in 2000. For an exception, coal industry to generate
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power
had not been changing
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over
the period
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
.
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IELTS academic Electricity production by fuel in Australia and France from 1980 to 2000

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
236 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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