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drinking habit of the Australians in five cities, namely: Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart.

drinking habit of the Australians in five cities, namely: Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart. BMnB5
The chart given depicts drinking habit of the Australians in five cities, namely: Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart. Overall, it can be observed that going to cafe for coffee or tea was the most favourable choice, except Adelaide. In addition, the number of people purchasing instant coffee was always higher than those who bought the fresh coffee. In term of the expenditure of fresh coffee, the number of customers in Sydney was the highest in five cities at the level of roughly 44%, whereas that in Brisbane and Adelaide stood at the lowest point at 34 %. However, despite a considerable fluctuation of the quantity of people buying instant coffee from 45% to 54%, the percentage of customers going to café for coffee or tea in Sydney, Melbourne and Hobart are all more than 60% and peaked at 64% in Melbourne. In addition, the number of people going to café in Adelaide is the fewest comparing to the other four cities.
The chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
depicts drinking habit of the Australians in five cities,
namely
: Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart.

Overall
, it can
be observed
that going to
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or tea was the most
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourable' is British English.
favourable
choice, except Adelaide.
In addition
, the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
purchasing instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
was always higher than those who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
the fresh coffee.

In term of the expenditure of fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
, the number of customers in Sydney was the highest in five cities at the level of roughly 44%, whereas that in Brisbane and Adelaide stood at the lowest point at 34 %.
However
, despite a considerable fluctuation of the quantity of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
buying instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
from 45% to 54%, the percentage of customers going to café for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or tea in Sydney, Melbourne and Hobart are all more than 60% and peaked at 64% in Melbourne.
In addition
, the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
going to café in Adelaide is the fewest comparing to the other four cities.
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IELTS academic drinking habit of the Australians in five cities, namely: Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
162 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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