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Discuss about water cycle diagram

Discuss about water cycle diagram pLQ6L
The diagram illustrates the key stages in the water cycle. Overall, The water cycle is the continual process of water evaporating and clouds forming then which return water to the land and sea in the form of rain. The Ocean is the biggest body of water on the earth and it contributes about 80% of total water vapour in the air. Once the water evaporates which is condensed to form the clouds by the condensation process. These clouds formations are filled with evaporated water from the sea. During Precipitation, the water returns to the earth in the form of rain to fill the lakes and sea. There is a surface runoff of groundwater from mountain regions, Also the groundwater increases from the water comes from trees This creates an impervious layer that flows back to the ocean. The merging of water from lakes and oceans is known as a saltwater intrusion.
The diagram illustrates the key stages in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
cycle.

Overall
, The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
cycle is the continual process of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
evaporating and clouds forming then which return
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
to the land and sea in the form of rain.

The Ocean is the biggest body of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
on the earth and it contributes about 80% of total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
Possible spelling mistake. 'vapour' is British English.
vapour
in the air.
“Once” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Once
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
evaporates which
is condensed
to form the clouds by the condensation process. These clouds formations
are filled
with evaporated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
from the sea.

During Precipitation, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
returns to the earth in the form of rain to fill the lakes and sea. There is a surface runoff of groundwater from mountain regions,
Also
the groundwater increases from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
from trees This creates an impervious layer that flows back to the ocean. The merging of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
from lakes and oceans
is known
as a saltwater intrusion.
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IELTS academic Discuss about water cycle diagram

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
151 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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