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Describe the number of train passengers

Describe the number of train passengers l7eLb
The first line chart illustrates how many train passengers were between 2000 and 2009 while the second line chart demonstrates the proportion of trains on time, the figures are depicted in millions and percentage respectively. Overall, it can be seen that the number of passengers fluctuated considerably and the rate of trains that were on time exceeded the target of 95% in four years incoherently during this period. According to the first line graph, the number of train travellers started at a little over 35. After fluctuating between 35 and 40, it reached a peak at just over 45 in 2005. In the next three years, there was an upward trend in the number of train travellers, and it rose minimally by two at the end of the period. By looking at the second graph, the trains' rate on time increased gradually and passed the target by four in four years. However, there was a plummet to 92 in 2006, but then it grew significantly to peak at 97 at the end of period.
The
first
line chart illustrates how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
passengers were between 2000 and 2009 while the second line chart demonstrates the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
on time, the figures
are depicted
in millions and percentage
respectively
.
Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the number of passengers fluctuated
considerably
and the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
that were on time exceeded the target of 95% in four years
incoherently
during this period.

According to the
first
line graph, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
at a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
over 35. After fluctuating between 35 and 40, it reached a peak at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 45 in 2005. In the
next
three years, there was an upward trend in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
, and it rose
minimally
by two at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period.

By looking at the second graph, the trains' rate on time increased
gradually
and passed the target by four in four years.
However
, there was a plummet to 92 in 2006,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
then it grew
significantly
to peak at 97 at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of period.
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IELTS academic Describe the number of train passengers

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
174 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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