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Describe the changing of Youngsville from 1980 to 2005

Describe the changing of Youngsville from 1980 to 2005 l7ogw
The maps illustrate how Youngsville in New Zealand changed over a 25-year period from 1980 to 2005. Overall, what stands out from the map is that after 25 years the town developed from a rural to an industrial area. Beginning with the North of Alanah river, the hospital which was located in the Northwest of the town remained unchanged while many trees around the lake and both sides of the street were cut down to make way for a new parking lot. Besides, in the Northeast of the town, the houses were all torn down in order to extend the railway road from the south in the latter year. A stadium and another parking lot were also built on the vacant land nearby. Moreover, a new Marina harbour was constructed at the south of the new railway. Turning to the South of the river, while the school which was located in turn as the West and the Southwest of the town still existed, factories and warehouses were built in the place of the houses and trees as well as woodland. At the same time, on the left side of the railway road of this part, the houses and trees also were cleared and replace by skyscrapers in 2005.
The maps illustrate how
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Youngsville
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
New
Zealand
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
over a 25-year period from 1980 to 2005.

Overall
, what stands out from the map is that after 25 years the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
developed from a rural to an industrial area.

Beginning with the North of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Alanah
river, the hospital which
was located
in the Northwest of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
remained unchanged while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
trees around the lake and both sides of the street were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
way for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
parking lot.
Besides
, in the Northeast of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
were all torn down in order to extend the railway road from the south in the latter year. A stadium and another parking lot were
also
built on the vacant land nearby.
Moreover
,

a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
Marina
Possible spelling mistake. 'harbour' is British English.
harbour
was constructed
at the south of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
railway.

Turning to the South of the river, while the school which
was located
in turn as the West and the Southwest of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
still
existed, factories and warehouses
were built
in the place of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
and trees
as well
as woodland. At the same time, on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
side of the railway road of this part, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
and trees
also
were cleared
and replace by skyscrapers in 2005.

IELTS academic Describe the changing of Youngsville from 1980 to 2005

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
208 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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