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Contained in the bar charts is the satisfaction of American people based on their ages, marital status, and their children’s influences. All figures are showed in percentage.

Contained in the bar charts is the satisfaction of American people based on their ages, marital status, and their children’s influences. All figures are showed in percentage. m9GDr
Contained in the bar charts is the satisfaction of American people based on their ages, marital status, and their children’s influences. All figures are showed in percentage. A glance at the provided graphics reveals that all data which illustrate for the level of happiness are lower than a half whereas married people seem to be happier than singled. To begin with, the rating of unmarried people is approximately 21% for the under 65 age group and considerably 34% for the oldest. On the other hand, that of the married is doubled, at 45%, 44%, 40% and 44% for 18-29 age group, 30-49, 50-64 and over 65, respectively. It is clear that being parents have certain impact on married couples. In particular, the recorded rating is about 44% for parents with under 18 years old children, fractionally lower at 41% for the 18 plus children, and 43% for the ones without children.
Contained in the bar charts is the satisfaction of American
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
based on their ages, marital status, and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
influences. All figures are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
in percentage.

A glance at the provided graphics reveals that all data which illustrate for the level of happiness are lower than a half whereas married
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
seem to be happier than singled.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the rating of unmarried
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
is approximately 21% for the under 65 age group and
considerably
34% for the oldest.
On the other hand
, that of the married
is doubled
, at 45%, 44%, 40% and 44% for 18-29 age group, 30-49, 50-64 and over 65,
respectively
.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that being parents have certain impact on married couples.
In particular
, the recorded rating is about 44% for parents with under 18 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
fractionally
lower at 41% for the 18 plus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, and 43% for the ones without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
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IELTS academic Contained in the bar charts is the satisfaction of American people based on their ages, marital status, and their children’s influences. All figures are showed in percentage.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
151 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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