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coffee and tea purchasing and consuming habits in the last 4 weeks in 5 Australian cities

coffee and tea purchasing and consuming habits in the last 4 weeks in 5 Australian cities nEoxn
The given bar chart illustrates the percentage of resident’s coffee and tea purchasing and consuming habits in the last 4 week in Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Horbart – 5 cities in Austrailia. In general, it is obvious that going to a coffee shop to have a cup of coffee or tea was the most common habit, except in Adelaide. Additionally, the percentage of people buying instant coffee was always higher than people buying fresh coffee and want to the coffee shop in all cities. In terms of Sydney and Melbourne, while the percentage of Sydney’s people drinking tea or coffee at a café was about 61% and for Melbourn it was slightly higher, about 63%. Meanwhile, above 45% of citizens in Sydney and Melbourne like to buy instant coffee, but the percentage of buying fresh coffee in these two cities were around 44% and 43%. The 3 ramaining cities, Hobart have the largest percentage of buying coffee and tea at the coffee shop, next is Brisbane and Adelaide, at about. . .
The
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given
bar chart illustrates the
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percentage
of resident’s
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coffee
and
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tea
purchasing and consuming habits in the last 4 week in Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Horbart
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
5 cities in
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Austrailia
.

In general
, it is obvious that going to a
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coffee
shop to have a cup of
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coffee
or
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tea
was the most common habit, except in Adelaide.
Additionally
, the
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percentage
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
was always higher than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
and want to the
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coffee
shop in all cities.

In terms of Sydney and Melbourne, while the
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percentage
of Sydney’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
drinking
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tea
or
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coffee
at a café was about 61% and for
Possible spelling mistake found.
Melbourn
it was
slightly
higher, about 63%. Meanwhile, above 45% of citizens in Sydney and Melbourne like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
instant
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coffee
,
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but
the
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percentage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
in these two cities were around 44% and 43%.

The 3
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ramaining
cities, Hobart
The singular proper name 'Hobart' must be used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "has", "had".
have
the largest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
at the
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coffee
shop,
next
is Brisbane and Adelaide, at about.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
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IELTS academic coffee and tea purchasing and consuming habits in the last 4 weeks in 5 Australian cities

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
173 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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