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Coffee and tea buying and drinking in 5 australia cities

Coffee and tea buying and drinking in 5 australia cities LwD2K
The chart provides information about tye outcome of individuals habit on buying and driking coffee and tea in Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart. The figure are expressed in percentage pf city residents. Overall, as can be seen in the figures the percentage of people who visited coffee shop to purchase coffee or tea is much higher than buying a fresh coffee or instant coffee in last four weeks. Although, individuals visiting in cafe is in upward trend in four weeks while, buying a fresh coffee steadily in downward trend in five different cities in australia.
The chart provides information about
Possible spelling mistake found.
tye
outcome of individuals habit on buying and
Possible spelling mistake found.
driking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
and tea in Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart. The figure
You should probably use "is".
are
expressed in percentage pf city residents.

Overall
, as can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the figures the percentage of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who visited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
shop to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or tea is much higher than buying a fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
in last four weeks. Although, individuals visiting in
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
is in upward trend in four weeks while, buying a fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
steadily
in downward trend in five
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cities in
Possible spelling mistake found.
australia
.
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IELTS academic Coffee and tea buying and drinking in 5 australia cities

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
96 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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