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Censorship of art and artists

Censorship of art and artists d5Bjo
In current world, every individual should be able to expose themselves to any kind of art as well as cultural activities. But lately we have been encountering the initialization of censorship of the art and respective artists. In this essay we are not only going to thow some light but also advocate on the importance of presence of such activities against their censorship. Though freedom of speech and actions has provided people the liberality to perform whatever they want, but this has also led the government to take seizing actions against such artists without undergoing the legal process. As a result of which those kinds are getting affected which might turn the tables around and lead the society to be a better place. For instance, if exhibitions are prohibited in a school or college, there is a huge chance that excellent ideas are getting caged and brilliant minds are unable to share their views and discoveries. Leading to least awareness to their colleagues and surrounding neighborhood. In addition to this, as we are already aware that childhood is the basic stage to enhance cultural and artistic knowledge, prohibiting these activities will lead the young minds to unawareness of presence and importance of art. This will also lead to presence of least artistic minds in our society. At last, summering up my justification and avocations, I would like to conclude that art and culture play a real vital role on our society and suppressing it has worst effect on our society
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
world, every individual should be able to expose themselves to any kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
as well
as cultural activities.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
lately we have been encountering the initialization of censorship of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and respective artists.

In this essay we are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
going to
Possible spelling mistake found.
thow
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
light
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
advocate on the importance of presence of such activities against their censorship.

Though freedom of speech and actions has provided
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
the liberality to perform whatever they want,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this has
also
led the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to take seizing actions against such artists without undergoing the legal process.
As a result
of which those kinds are getting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
which might turn the tables around and lead the society to be a better place.
For instance
, if exhibitions
are prohibited
in a school or college, there is a huge chance that excellent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
are getting caged and brilliant minds are unable to share their views and discoveries. Leading to
A determiner is probably missing here: "the least".
least
awareness to their colleagues and surrounding neighborhood.

In addition
to this, as we are already aware that childhood is the basic stage to enhance cultural and artistic knowledge, prohibiting these activities will lead the young minds to unawareness of presence and importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
. This will
also
lead to presence of
A determiner is probably missing here: "the least".
least
artistic minds in our society.

At last, summering up my justification and avocations, I would like
to conclude
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and culture play a real vital role on our society and suppressing it has
A determiner is probably missing here: "the worst".
worst
effect on our society

IELTS academic Censorship of art and artists

Academic
  American English
6 paragraphs
249 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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