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Bar chart with marital status

Bar chart with marital status 9wJJr
The given bar charts provide information about the number of marriages and divorces in USA as well as marital status of American citizens over a period of three decades, from 1970 to 2000. Overall, it can clearly be seen that the number of married American adults decreased throughout the given period, while the divorced rates fluctuated. Moreover, the highest marital status in the USA was married in both years. In terms of the number of marriages and divorces in the USA, the figures started at precisely 2. 5 and one million in 1970, respectively. In the following ten years, the number for married adults remained steady whereas the figure for divorces experienced moderate increase to just below 1. 5 million. Both figures then decreased to about 2. 3 million and just above one million in 1990, before declining to two million for marriages and divorces backed to its original level at exactly one million in the final year. Regarding the number proportion of marital status of adult Americans, the percentage of married adults were the highest at both years, made up 70% of marital status of adult Americans in 1970 and dropped slightly to 60% to 2000. While the never married was in the second position with about 12% in 1970 and rose to precisely 20% in the following two decades. Similarly, the rate of divorced adults in American also witnessed a slight growth from about one percent in 1970 to approximately 9% in the final year. On the contrary, the figures for widowed declined slightly from roughly 8% to 6% in 2000.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
bar charts provide information about the
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number
of marriages and
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divorces
A determiner is probably missing here: "in the USA".
in USA
as well
as
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marital
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status
of American citizens over a period of three decades, from 1970 to 2000.

Overall
, it can
clearly
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the
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number
of married American
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adults
decreased throughout the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period, while the divorced rates fluctuated.
Moreover
, the highest
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marital
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status
in the USA
was married
in both years.

In terms of the
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number
of marriages and
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divorces
in the USA, the
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figures
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
at
precisely
2. 5 and one
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million
in 1970,
respectively
. In the following ten years, the
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number
for married
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adults
remained steady whereas the
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figure
for
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divorces
experienced moderate increase to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
below 1. 5
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million
. Both
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figures
then decreased to about 2. 3
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million
and
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just
above one
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million
in 1990,
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before
declining to two
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million
for marriages and
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divorces
backed to its original level at exactly one
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million
in the final year.

Regarding the
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number
proportion of
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marital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
status
of adult Americans, the percentage of married
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adults
were the highest at both years, made up 70% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
status
of adult Americans in 1970 and dropped
slightly
to 60% to 2000. While the never married was in the second position with about 12% in 1970 and rose to
precisely
20% in the following two decades.
Similarly
, the rate of divorced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
in American
also
witnessed a slight growth from about one percent in 1970 to approximately 9% in the final year.
On the contrary
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
for widowed declined
slightly
from roughly 8% to 6% in 2000.

IELTS academic Bar chart with marital status

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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