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bar chart about fast food in restuarant

bar chart about fast food in restuarant MMpBL
The given bar chart delineates the percentage of various frequency of fast food consumption in 3 different years 2003, 2006, and 2013. At the first glance, it is clear that the majority of people once a week or one or two time a month went to the fast-food restaurant in all three years, whereas, the minority of people are who spend their every day in a fast-food restaurant or did not visit there at all. Approximately, under5%of people in 2003, 2006, and 2013 had fast food every day or did not eat fast food at all, which this number was a bit more in 2003 than in 2006 and 2013. On the other hand, in 2003, over 30% of people ate fast food once a week, and exactly 30% had fast food as their food once or twice a month. In 2006, people who had a habit of eating fast food once a year constituted about 32% of all, and a quarter of people visited fast-food restaurants one or two times a month. A huge amount of people in 2013 preferred to eat fast food just once or twice during 4 weeks (32%), also the number of people who dedicated a day in a week for eating fast food fell down compared to 2006 and almost 27% of people ate fastfood one day in a week.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
bar chart delineates the percentage of various frequency of
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fast
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food
consumption in 3
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different
years 2003, 2006, and 2013.

At the
first
glance, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the majority of
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people
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once
a
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week
or one or two time a month went to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-food restaurant in all three years, whereas, the minority of
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people
are who spend their every day in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-food restaurant or did not visit there at all.

Approximately, under5%of
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people
in 2003, 2006, and 2013 had
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fast
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food
every day or did not eat
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fast
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food
at all, which this number was a bit more in 2003 than in 2006 and 2013.

On the other hand
, in 2003, over 30% of
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people
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ate
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fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
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once
a
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week
, and exactly 30% had
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fast
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food
as their
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food
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once
or twice a month. In 2006,
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people
who had a habit of eating
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fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
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once
a year constituted about 32% of all, and a quarter of
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people
visited
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-food restaurants one or two times a month. A huge amount of
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people
in 2013 preferred to eat
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fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
once
or twice during 4
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weeks
(32%),
also
the number of
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people
who dedicated a day in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
for eating
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fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
fell down compared to 2006 and almost 27% of
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ate
Possible spelling mistake found.
fastfood
one day in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
.
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IELTS academic bar chart about fast food in restuarant

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
226 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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