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Active participation rates in top ten sports in 1998 and 2005 in Canada

Active participation rates in top ten sports in 1998 and 2005 in Canada jR5a1
The chart gives information about the percentage of people taking part in sports in Canada in1998 and 2005. Overall, paticipation rates in 2005 in comparsion with rates in 1998 was lower in all type of sports except soccer. The most preferable sports were ice hockey and golf. The proportion of people paticipating in golf dropped from 22% in 1998 to 20%in 2005. Followed by, the percentage of people taking up ice hockey was about 17% in 1998 and 16% in 2005, respectively. In addition, it can be seen that the baseball participation rates decreased dramatically from 17% to 6%. Undergoing the same downward trend, the swimming paticipation rates declined from 13% to about 10%. The paticipation rates in other types were witnessed the same downward trend but at lower rates. the paticipation rates in cycling, volleyball, downhill skiing were dropped at the same rates around 7% whereas the proportion of people playing tennis felt slightly from 8% to 6%. In contrast, soccer paticipation rates increased marginally from 8% in 1998 to 10% in 2005.
The chart gives information about the percentage of
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people
taking part in sports in Canada in1998 and 2005.

Overall
,
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paticipation
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rates
in 2005 in
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comparsion
with
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rates
in 1998 was lower in all type of sports except soccer. The most preferable sports were ice hockey and golf.

The proportion of
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people
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paticipating
in golf dropped from 22% in 1998 to 20%in 2005. Followed by, the percentage of
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people
taking up ice hockey was about 17% in 1998 and 16% in 2005,
respectively
.
In addition
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the baseball participation
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rates
decreased
dramatically
from 17% to 6%. Undergoing the same downward trend, the swimming
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paticipation
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rates
declined from 13% to about 10%.

The
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paticipation
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rates
in other types
were witnessed
the same downward trend
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but
at lower
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rates
.
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the
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paticipation
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rates
in cycling, volleyball, downhill skiing
were dropped
at the same
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rates
around 7% whereas the proportion of
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people
playing tennis felt
slightly
from 8% to 6%.
In contrast
, soccer
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paticipation
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rates
increased
marginally
from 8% in 1998 to 10% in 2005.
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IELTS academic Active participation rates in top ten sports in 1998 and 2005 in Canada

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
174 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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