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A bar chart shows the proportion of renewable energy

A bar chart shows the proportion of renewable energy VrN9w
The chart, which is demonstrates information about the share of renewable energy in general sourse of energy throughout three different period in 2000, 2004 and 2007, occured in Australia, Germany, Norway and Iceland. Units are measured in percentage. Overall, the utilazation of renewable power was dominant in Norway and Iceland; however Iceland expirienced martinal drop. Whereas in other two countries in Australia and Germany compared with previous countries the proportion of inexhaustable power made tiny from total energy use. As we can see on the chart, in twenty-first century the higher indicator among states was obseved in Norway at just over a tree-fifths (61%), and the minor one had ocurred in Australia by 8% from the total energy use. Having increased in 3 points (64%) the renewable energy use in Norway still was the dominant, in 2004. Interestingly, at that period all countries indicator of renewable energy use rose insignificantly.
The chart, which is demonstrates information about the share of
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renewable
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energy
in general
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sourse
of
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energy
throughout three
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different
period in 2000, 2004 and 2007,
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occured
in Australia, Germany, Norway and Iceland. Units
are measured
in percentage.

Overall
, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
utilazation
of
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renewable
power was dominant in Norway and Iceland;
however
Iceland
Possible spelling mistake found.
expirienced
Possible spelling mistake found.
martinal
drop. Whereas in other two countries in Australia and Germany compared with previous countries the proportion of
Possible spelling mistake found.
inexhaustable
power made tiny from total
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energy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.

As we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
on the chart, in twenty-
first
century the higher indicator among states was
Possible spelling mistake found.
obseved
in Norway at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over a tree-fifths (61%), and the minor one had
Possible spelling mistake found.
ocurred
in Australia by 8% from the total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. Having increased in 3 points (64%) the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
renewable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in Norway
still
was the dominant, in 2004.
Interestingly
, at that period all
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countries
indicator of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
renewable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
rose
insignificantly
.
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IELTS academic A bar chart shows the proportion of renewable energy

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
150 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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