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Describe an important decision you made with the help of someone else. v.1

Describe an important decision you made with the help of someone else. v. 1
Describe an important decision you made with the help of someone else. You should say: what the decision was who helped you how he/she helped you and explain why you took help from this person regarding this decision. [You will have to talk about the topic for one to two minutes. You have one minute to think about what you are going to say. You can make some notes to help you if you wish. ]   Model Answer 1: Sometimes in life, there comes a time when we just don’t know what we should do, or what decision we should make, when we are presented with a number of options to choose from. Should that be the case, we should always, in my opinion, rely on the wisdom and knowledge of others who are in a position to guide us in the right direction. Please allow me to share with you such an experience in which my older cousin helped me in making an important decision of my life. It was after my A level graduation, I was struggling to decide whether I should have pursued a degree at a regular university in Business Administration, or I should be more focused on securing admission at an Engineering college. Given the benefits of having a better career option in attending an engineering college, I could have easily gone for an engineering degree. On the other hand, with a real possibility of receiving a very handsome scholarship option in pursuing a degree in Business Administration without leaving home, getting admission at a university wasn’t a bad option either. I needed to make a sound decision since the choice also involved staying with my parents or leaving them for a better “opportunity”.   But the problem was my parents left the decision up to me. Luckily, I had my cousin who almost always had acted as my “saviour” in the past, and this time was no exception. I decided to take admission to a regular university in Business Administration. My cousin was about 10 years older than me, but I could always count on him because of his cool and calm head. Besides, he was an engineer himself. So, I knew that he would help me with some good advice. On top of that, my cousin would always take time in analyzing a situation before coming to a decision. And, knowing how much of a “well-wisher” he really was for me and my family, I and my parents knew that we were going to get a very “practical and right” decision from my cousin. Finally, my cousin had to struggle a lot in his life before establishing himself as a successful engineer as well as a businessman at the same time.   So, it was quite natural for me to value and admire him as a good “counsellor”.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Describe
an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
you made with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of someone else. You should say: what the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
was who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
you how he/she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
you and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why you took
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
from this person regarding this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
. [You will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
talk about the topic for one to two minutes. You have one minute to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about what you are going to say. You can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
notes to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you if you wish.
Loose punctuation mark.
]
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Model Answer 1:
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
in life, there
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
when we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
don’t know what we should do, or what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
we should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
, when we
are presented
with a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
options
to choose from. Should that be the case, we should always, in my opinion, rely on the wisdom and knowledge of others who are in a position to guide us in the
right
direction.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Please
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
me to share with you such an experience in which my older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
me in making an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
of my life.

It was after my A level graduation, I was struggling to decide whether I should have pursued a degree at a regular university in Business Administration, or I should be more focused on securing admission at an Engineering college.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
the benefits of having a better career
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
option
in attending an engineering college, I could have
easily
gone for an engineering degree.
On the other hand
, with a real possibility of receiving a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
handsome scholarship
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
option
in pursuing a degree in Business Administration without leaving home, getting admission at a university wasn’t a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
option
either. I needed to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a sound
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
since the choice
also
involved staying with my parents or leaving them for a better “opportunity”.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the problem was my parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
up to me. Luckily, I had my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
who almost always had acted as my “
Possible spelling mistake found.
saviour
” in the past, and this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
was no exception. I decided to take admission to a regular university in Business Administration.

My
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
was about 10 years older than me,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I could always count on him
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of his cool and calm head.
Besides
, he was an engineer himself.
So
, I knew that he would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
me with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
advice.
On top of that
, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
would always take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in analyzing a situation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
coming to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
. And, knowing how much of a “
well
-wisher” he
really
was for me and my family, I and my parents knew that we were going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
“practical and
right
”
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
from my cousin.

Finally
, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
had to struggle a lot in his life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
establishing himself as a successful engineer as
well
as a businessman at the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
So
, it was quite natural for me to value and admire him as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
“
Possible spelling mistake. 'counsellor' is British English.
counsellor
”.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
A foreign language is like a frail, delicate muscle. If you do not use it, it weakens.
Jhumpa Lahiri

IELTS speaking Describe an important decision you made with the help of someone else. v. 1

Speaking
  American English
4 paragraphs
476 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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