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Describe a decision made by someone you know that changed his/her life. v.1

Describe a decision made by someone you know that changed his/her life. v. 1
Describe a decision made by someone you know that changed his/her life. You should say: who this person is/was what decision he/she made whether it was a good decision and explain how this has changed this person's life. [You will have to talk about the topic for one to two minutes. You have one minute to think about what you are going to say. You can make some notes to help you if you wish. ]   Model Answer: We have to make a lot of decisions almost regularly to adjust to the changing circumstances of our life. Needless to say, not all of these decisions change our lives the way we expect them to. But, today, I would like to talk about a decision, taken by someone I know, which changed his life as expected. The person, I am talking about, was none other than one of my own cousins. To describe my cousin, the first thing, which I should tell about him, is that I have known him to a very restless person. In other words, he always used to keep changing his mind. For example, if he liked a certain shirt one day, he wouldn’t like it the very next day. So, my uncle and aunt (the parents of my cousin) were a bit worried about his mind-changing habit because they thought that the habit would affect his future life and career. But, somewhere deep inside my mind, I knew that my cousin was smart enough to make the right decisions at the right time when it would really matter, and I was proved right by my cousin when he took a decision about moving to a bigger city and stuck to it. Yes, moving to a bigger city was a game-changer and a good decision for my cousin because it was there where he managed to meet a group of brave entrepreneurs. The particular group of entrepreneurs, he met, was involved with different kinds of export and import business. As, my cousin started to do business with them with his rather limited capital, soon thereafter, he began to make a lot of profits. In fact, he became a millionaire within a few years. Anyway, moving to a bigger city change the life of my cousin because he finally found what he liked, and he liked making money. Besides, the decision also made him a more thoughtful and responsible person, which was missing from his life, when he was living with his parents in a small city. All in all, I am happy that my cousin took that life-changing decision.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Describe
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
made by someone
you know
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
his/her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. You should say: who this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is/was what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
he/she made whether it was a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
how this has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
this person's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. [You will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
talk about the topic for one to two minutes. You have one minute to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about what you are going to say. You can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
notes to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you if you wish.
Loose punctuation mark.
]
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Model Answer:

We
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decisions
almost
regularly
to adjust to the changing circumstances of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Needless to say
, not all of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decisions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
the way we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
them to.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
, I would like to talk about a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
, taken by someone I know, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
, I am talking about, was none other than one of my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousins
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
, the
first
thing, which I should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
about him, is that I have known him to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
restless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
.
In other words
, he always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
changing his mind.
For example
, if he liked a certain shirt one day, he wouldn’t like it the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
next
day.
So
, my uncle and aunt (the parents of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin)
were a bit worried about his mind-changing habit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that the habit would affect his future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and career.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, somewhere deep inside my mind, I knew that my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
was smart
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
the
right
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decisions
at the
right
time when it would
really
matter, and I
was proved
right
by my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
when he took a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
about moving to a bigger city and stuck to it. Yes, moving to a bigger city was a game-changer and a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
for my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it was there where he managed to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
a group of brave entrepreneurs. The particular group of entrepreneurs, he met,
was involved
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of export and import business. As, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to do business with them with his
rather
limited capital,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
thereafter, he began to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
profits. In fact, he became a millionaire within a few years.

Anyway
, moving to a bigger city
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
he
finally
found what he liked, and he liked making money.
Besides
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
also
made him a more thoughtful and responsible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
, which was missing from his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, when he was living with his parents in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
city. All in all, I am happy that my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cousin
took that life-changing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
35Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS speaking Describe a decision made by someone you know that changed his/her life. v. 1

Speaking
  American English
5 paragraphs
433 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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