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You re going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask a friend who live there for some help. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter give details of your study plans, explain why you want to get part time job, suggest how your friend could help you find a job.

Dear Ethel, I’m writing to ask you a favor I will go abroad the same as where you are right now. I will study and I’d like to ask you to look for a part -time job for me. I’m going to study, Business Management for 2 year-at Toronto University. This coming week is my flight because after a week my class will start. I enrolled last month and I have my schedule. Saturday and Sunday, is my free time and it’s good to have a job. I hope you will help me to find a part-time job. I badly needed an extra income to pay the rent of the house and for my expenses for groceries every week. I had work experience to a restaurant as a Crew for 1 year and 6months as a customers service at the mall. I had a certificate that I worked before. I will be great full for your help. Thank you and God bless. Your friend, Judith
Dear Ethel,

I’m writing to ask you a favor I will go abroad the same as where you are right
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. I will
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
study and
I’d like to ask you to look for a part -time job for me.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
’m going to study, Business Management for 2 year-at Toronto University. This coming week is my flight
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
after a week my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
. I enrolled last month and I have my schedule. Saturday and Sunday, is my free
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
time and
it’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to have a job. I hope you will
In informal texts, ‘to’ is not necessary. Do you mean “help me find”?
help me to find
a part-time job. I
badly
needed an extra income to pay the rent of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
and for my expenses for groceries every week.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
had work experience to a restaurant as a Crew for 1 year and 6months as a customers service at the mall.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
had a certificate that I worked
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
will be great full for your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.

Thank you and God bless.

Your friend,

Judith

IELTS letter You re going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask a friend who live there for some help. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter give details of your study plans, explain why you want to get part time job, suggest how your friend could help you find a job.

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
164 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • You re going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask a friend who live there for some help. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter give details of your study plans, explain why you want to get part time job, suggest how your friend could help you find a job.