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Write a letter to your friend who is currently into a new house. Ask him about the house, tell him that you can help, describe how you can help

Write a letter to your friend who is currently into a new house. Ask him about the house, tell him that you can help, describe how you can help 2Rkgx
Dear John, Hello! How are you? I am fine and I hope you are sailing in the same boat. First of all, I congratulate you for buying the new apartment, which was your keen desire for longtime. Being really excited, I wish to inquire about the address as well as any landmark regarding your house. Furthermore, I know this was a hard but necessary decision for you to make since the financial conditions of your family have not been sound after the demise of your father. As you know I have tile off from work on the weekends, I shall be at your disposal all the time during the shifting process. Besides this, I plan to arrange for a pickup lorry for the transportation of goods including furniture by contracting one of my friends running this business. As your relocating to my hometown, I also would assist you in services such as cable TV, electricity and water supply and most importantly, a house maid. Best wishes for further experiences in the new house. With lots of love Elly
Dear John,

Hello! How are you? I am fine and I hope you are sailing in the same boat.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, I congratulate you for buying the new apartment, which was your keen desire for longtime. Being
really
excited, I wish to inquire about the address
as well
as any landmark regarding your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
.

Furthermore
, I know this was a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
necessary decision for you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
since the financial conditions of your family have not been sound after the demise of your father. As you know I have tile off from work on the weekends, I shall be at your disposal all the time during the shifting process.

Besides
this, I plan to arrange for a pickup lorry for the transportation of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
including furniture by contracting one of my friends running this business. As your relocating to my hometown, I
also
would assist you in services such as cable TV, electricity and water supply and most
importantly
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
maid.

Best wishes for
further
experiences in the new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. With lots of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
Elly
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IELTS letter Write a letter to your friend who is currently into a new house. Ask him about the house, tell him that you can help, describe how you can help

Letter
  American English
6 paragraphs
177 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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