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Improvements needed for college room

Improvements needed for college room paEQd

Dear sir or madam, There is something that needs to be brought to your attention. The room that I am currently sharing with another person, is not in a great condition at all. It is becoming hard for me to concentrate on my work with the given room conditions. Some of the biggest problems that I am facing in the room include: Very poor lighting that doesn't encourage study work at all. The beds are not comfortable at all making me lose many hours of sleep. The bathroom facility isn't convenient as well. The room itself is too tight and small with not much space to stretch your legs in. During the day, it gets too hot in the room. Personally, I would prefer to be shifted to another accommodation that is more encouraging for my study work. I would prefer a more spacious room with better lighting and more comfortable bed in it. Also, the bathroom needs to be in better overall condition and the room should be more ventilated as well. Hope to hear your positive response very soon.

Dear sir or madam,

There is something that needs to be brought
 to your attention. The You use this word too often, consider replacing it withplacearea
room
 that I am currently
 sharing with another person, is not in a great condition at all. It is becoming This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :arduous
hard
 for me to concentrate on my work with the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :accorded
given
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withplacearea
room
 conditions.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
Some
 of the biggest problems that I am facing in the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withplacearea
room
 include: This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:extremelyimmenselysupremelysuperb
Very
 poor lighting that doesn't encourage study work at all. The beds are not comfortable at all making me lose This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a plethora ofa number ofnumerous
many
 hours of sleep. The bathroom facility isn't convenient as well
. Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withplacearea
room
 itself is too tight and This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:tiny
small
 with not much space to stretch your legs in. During the day, it This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquires
gets
 too hot in the room.

Personally
, I would prefer to be shifted
 to another accommodation that is
 more encouraging for my study work. I would prefer a more spacious You use this word too often, consider replacing it withplacearea
room
 with better lighting and more comfortable bed in it. Also
, the bathroom needs to be in better overall
 condition and the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withplacearea
room
 should be more ventilated as well
.

Hope to hear your This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:beneficial
positive
 response This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:extremelyimmenselysupremelysuperb
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:in the near future
soon
. 