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An annual event was recently held in your area. Now you want to write to the organizers of this event congratulating them on a successful production. v.2

An annual event was recently held in your area. Now you want to write to the organizers of this event congratulating them on a successful production. v. 2
Dear Sir or Madam, As a member of the Frederick community in the city of Munich, I am writing this letter to congratulate you on a very successful production of the Folk Music Festival which is held every year in our area. I am pretty sure that other members of our community would also feel the same way. Anyway, this folk music festival takes place in our area every year, but this probably is the first time in its history that you managed to attract so many people, not only from our own city but also from many other parts of our country, with your top class advertising works. Besides, your flawless seating arrangement, top-class sound system, and the choices of music just couldn’t be any better.   However, what I really liked the most about the event that you even allowed the audience to ask different kinds of questions to the present music artists about their life and hobbies in a very friendly and casual environment. Of course, you could perhaps arrange even a bigger venue with a more spacious parking area, but, again, other than that, the whole event was simply superb. Many thanks once again. Yours faithfully, Mark Henry
Dear Sir or Madam,

As a member of the Frederick community in the city of Munich, I am writing this letter to congratulate you on a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
successful production of the Folk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
Festival which
is held
every year in our area. I am pretty sure that other members of our community would
also
feel the same way.

Anyway, this folk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
festival takes place in our area every year,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this
probably
is the
first
time in its history that you managed to attract
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
from our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
city
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other parts of our country, with your top
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
advertising works.

Besides
, your flawless seating arrangement, top-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
sound system, and the choices of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
couldn’t be any better.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
However
, what I
really
liked the most about the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
that you even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
the audience to ask
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of questions to the present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
artists about their life and hobbies in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
friendly and casual environment.

Of course
, you could perhaps arrange even a bigger venue with a more spacious parking area,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, again, other than that, the whole
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
was
simply
superb.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
thanks once again.

Yours
faithfully
,

Mark Henry
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS letter An annual event was recently held in your area. Now you want to write to the organizers of this event congratulating them on a successful production. v. 2

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
201 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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