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Writing task 2 You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Some exports believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Recently an increasing number of people place emphasis on language learning of the next generation. Opinions may differ as to whether it is better for children to begin the acquisition of a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. It is undeniable that having classes of a new language at primary school may deliver some negative consequences. Primary school students are generally known to have limited learning ability. Therefore, learning the basics of multiple languages simultaneously can be too much of a burden for them, resulting in poor performance. A further downside is that words of the same meaning in different languages may confuse young students. This might lead to to a generation of a mixed language, which will impede them even from mastering their mother tongue. Nevertheless, the disadvantages could be mitigated by carefully designing the curriculum so that the lessons can reflect the development of children's cognition abilities. Foreign language courses should start at higher grades of primary school in order to avoid interference with the learning of native language. Acquiring a second language early can generate numerous positive outcomes. It could be conducive to the growth of their brain, since being bilingual activates different parts of the brain, and the growth of the brain is more active when it is used frequently. In addition to this, learning a foreign language at primary school can broader their horizon earlier, thus cultivating their international competence. One should also consider the fact that younger people have better ability in language acquisition due to the structure of their brain. To sum up, I agree that the advantages of beginning the acquisition of a foreign language at primary school outweigh the disadvantages.
Recently an increasing number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
place emphasis on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
of the
next
generation. Opinions may differ
Consider shortening this phrase to just “whether”, or rephrase the sentence to avoid “as to”.
as to whether
it is better for children to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
the acquisition of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
rather
than secondary school.

It

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
is
undeniable that having classes of a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
may deliver
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
students are
generally
known to have limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
ability.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
the basics of multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
simultaneously
can be too much of a burden for them, resulting in poor performance. A
further
downside is that words of the same meaning in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
may confuse young students. This might lead
Possible typo: you repeated a word
to to
a generation of a mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, which will impede them even from mastering their mother tongue.

Nevertheless
,

the disadvantages could
be mitigated
by
carefully
designing the curriculum
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the lessons can reflect the development of children's cognition abilities.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
courses should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
at higher grades of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
in order to avoid interference with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
of native language.

Acquiring

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
a
second
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language
early can generate numerous
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
outcomes. It could be conducive to the growth of their brain, since being bilingual activates
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parts of the brain, and the growth of the brain is more active when it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
frequently
.
In addition
to this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
can broader their horizon earlier,
thus
cultivating their international competence. One should
also
consider the fact that younger
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have better ability in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
acquisition due to the structure of their brain.

To

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
sum
up, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the advantages of beginning the acquisition of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
outweigh the disadvantages.
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IELTS essay Writing task 2 : Some exports believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
9 paragraphs
282 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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