Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

With the increased global demand in oil and gas,undiscovered areas of the world should be opened up to access more resources. To what extent do you agree?

With the increased global demand in oil and gas, undiscovered areas of the world should be opened up to access more resources. q29a
Nowadays, control of disease are getting most important for every ages of people. these people claim that prevention of disease can be better option than treating disease. this essay will amplify that why prevention is necessary over cure. With regards to current generation, they are affected more by many disease. firstly people are doing much work in their daily life, because of the reason they could not get chance for exercise, such as gym walking etc. for example, people are suffering more and more by diabetes at this moment which can be implemented by doing exercise or proper guidelines, whereas it's treatment is much expensive. these few instances have bolstered the existing concept that disease can be prevents by proper steps. It is clear evidence that day by day treatment cost are increased, people could not cover up these cost in every time. in addition, many of the peoples are facing many  dangerous diseases, which treatment is much lengthy and expensive. such as one of my uncle who is getting healthy day by day, he took treatment and medicines but it did not work, he could not even do any works and then he followed proper guideline for dieting and maintaining himself. overall the idea of the prevention is much effective than researching and treatment. To sum up this essay amplified that, people who are suffering any disease they should prevent it than any treatment. i believe that, by taking genuine steps can prevent all disease easily rather than any kind of expensive or lengthy treatment process which can be harmful for health
Nowadays, control of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
are getting most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "age"?
ages
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that prevention of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
can be better option than treating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
this
essay will amplify that why prevention is necessary over cure.

Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
With regards to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
generation, they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
more by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
firstly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
work in their daily life,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the reason they could not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
chance for exercise, such as gym walking etc.
for example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are suffering more and more by diabetes at this moment which can
be implemented
by doing exercise or proper guidelines, whereas it's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
expensive.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
these
few instances have bolstered the existing concept that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
can be
Consider using the past participle "prevented"?
prevents
by proper steps.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
evidence that day by day
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
cost
are increased
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could not cover up these cost in every time.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
addition,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples
are facing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
, which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
lengthy and expensive.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
such
as one of my uncle who is getting healthy day by day, he took
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
and medicines
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it did not work, he could not even do any
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
works and
then he followed proper guideline for dieting and maintaining himself.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
overall
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of the prevention is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
Use "(effective)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
effective
than researching and treatment.

To sum up this essay amplified that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are suffering any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
it than any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
.
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
believe that, by taking genuine steps can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
easily
rather
than any kind of expensive or lengthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
process which can be harmful for
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
health
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay With the increased global demand in oil and gas, undiscovered areas of the world should be opened up to access more resources.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • With the increased global demand in oil and gas,undiscovered areas of the world should be opened up to access more resources. To what extent do you agree?