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With divorce rates and family breakdowns increasing globally, it is generally accepted that families today are not as close as they used to be. Discuss the causes of this problem and offer some possible solutions to it.

With divorce rates and family breakdowns increasing globally, it is generally accepted that families today are not as close as they used to be. Discuss the causes of this problem and offer some possible solutions to it. nWW7
Divorce and family breakdown were virtually unheard of just 100 years ago. Now, however, almost half of all marriages fail. This phenomenon is symptomatic of the growing distance between family members in modern society. In this essay, I intend to explore the sources of this problem, along with some possible solutions to it. Chief among the causes of this problem is the modern lifestyle. Today’s parents have to work harder than those of previous generations to support their families. Traditionally, one parent assumed the breadwinner's role, while the other – typically the mother – acted as the homemaker. Recently, though, double-income families have become the norm. Consequently, an increasing number of children now grow up in a parentless environment. Little wonder, then, that they feel alienated. Another contributing factor is the passive and solitary nature of many modern forms of entertainment. In order to resolve this sense of alienation within families, I believe we must first address its root causes. Perhaps the most effective method of doing this would be for governments to offer financial incentives to parents who choose to remain at home and take care of their families. Admittedly, such incentives would probably not fully compensate couples for lost income; however, they would at least soften the hardship of living on a single income and provide an alternative for parents who would rather remain at home but are unable to do so because of financial constraints. One further measure would be to promote more interactive leisure activities in the community through public education campaigns. In conclusion, I believe that this is clearly a problem of such complexity that no solution is likely in the short term. However, I believe that the measures outlined above would constitute an excellent first step.
Divorce and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
breakdown were
virtually
unheard of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
100 years ago.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
,
however
, almost half of all marriages fail. This phenomenon is symptomatic of the growing distance between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members in modern society. In this essay, I intend to explore the sources of this problem, along with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
possible solutions to it.

Chief among the causes of this problem is the modern lifestyle.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work harder than those of previous generations to support their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
.
Traditionally
, one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
assumed the breadwinner's role, while the other
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
typically
the mother
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
acted as the homemaker. Recently, though, double-income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
have become the norm.
Consequently
, an increasing number of children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
grow up in a
Possible spelling mistake found.
parentless
environment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Little
wonder, then, that they feel alienated. Another contributing factor is the passive and solitary nature of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
modern forms of entertainment.

In order to resolve this sense of alienation within
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
, I believe we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
first
address its root causes. Perhaps the most effective method of doing this would be for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
to offer financial incentives to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
who choose to remain at home and take care of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
.
Admittedly
, such incentives would
probably
not
fully
compensate couples for lost income;
however
, they would at least soften the hardship of living on a single income and provide an alternative for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
who would
rather
remain at home
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
are unable to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of financial constraints. One
further
measure would be to promote more interactive leisure activities in the community through public education campaigns.

In conclusion
, I believe that this is
clearly
a problem of such complexity that no solution is likely in the short term.
However
, I believe that the measures outlined above would constitute an excellent
first
step.
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IELTS essay With divorce rates and family breakdowns increasing globally, it is generally accepted that families today are not as close as they used to be. Discuss the causes of this problem and offer some possible solutions to it.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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