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Some people believe that children's leisure activities must be educational; otherwise they are a complete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your experience.

Some people believe that children's leisure activities must be educational; otherwise they are a complete waste of time. wLLY
Free health service is one of the best thing government could provide to the people living in country. However, it is understandable that some of the medical services are scarcely available for the people and it would be very difficult for the government to provide these kind of medical service for free. The following essay will explain my opinion in detail. One of the qualities of the developed countries is that they provide most of the medical aid and service for free to their local residents. I believe not only developed countries, but the entire world should try to provide medical service to people for free. One of the reasons for free medical aid is that most of the people cannot afford the expenses for their medical condition. Treatments are so expensive that people die as they cannot afford the expenses of it. It would be a biggest lost for any country where people die as they cannot afford to pay for their medical bills. Moreover, for example nowadays the entire world is facing crises due to pandemic situation. There are less earning, people are jobless, there is no financial support. In this kind of situation if people get affected with any medical situation and the hospital would expect them to pay, that would not be possible for the people to bear the expenses. Government should financially support all of the hospital expenses and people should get free medical service. In my opinion, I would agree that every country should provide free health service to the public. If any of the medical service that is not available in the country, it should be given by seeking help from other countries.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Free
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
is one of the best thing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
However
, it is understandable that
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
are
scarcely
available for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and it would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
. The following essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my opinion in detail.

One of the qualities of the developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is that they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
aid and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
to their local residents. I believe not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the entire world should try to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
. One of the reasons for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
aid is that most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot afford the expenses for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
condition. Treatments are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
expensive that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
as they cannot afford the expenses of it. It would be
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
biggest lost for any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
as they cannot afford to pay for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
bills.

Moreover
,
for example
nowadays the entire world is facing crises due to pandemic situation. There are less earning,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are jobless, there is no financial support. In this kind of situation if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
with any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
situation and the hospital would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
them to pay, that would not be possible for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to bear the expenses.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should
financially
support
Consider using "all the".
all of the
hospital expenses and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
service.

In my opinion, I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
to the public. If any of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
that is
not available in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, it should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by seeking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
from other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that children's leisure activities must be educational; otherwise they are a complete waste of time.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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