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Way I want to go to Canada?

Basically I am freelancer and I work from home who completed graduation and start freelancing since 2010. It is now 10 years I am doing freelancing and I face lots of obstracal in the mine time. My first common problem is payment methods. I have lot of good clients and they paying me well but under marketplace, which is arrige big problem to me. Most of the marketplace take 20% of income from every freelancer, which is huge amount for us per year. Secondly, I know different type of business like, Dropshipping, Affiliate, Lead Generation and so no, but main problem is that I am unable to take money from clients or customars directly. For example, in the Dropshipping business I need a legal paymet methods where every customer can pay for their product easily so that I can ship their product. However, in our country do not have that kinds of payment methods so I am unable to start that business even I know that business very well and I can earn huge amount of money per year. Thirdly, working under marketplace is too much painfull because they undate their rules freaquently and suspend the account without any notification. Yes, it is mendatory to update rules but before take any action they should notify all of their freelancers who are stragling with their career. Every freelancer has good skill to make good amount of money but they always in panic that when their account will be closed. For instance, upwork is a big marketplace over the world who lead 70% of market share in this area and most of the top class freelancer work under freelancer, recently updated a rules that every person's payment methods should be seperate. Whatever, after updated their rules they closed many big account who already earned handred thousand of USD under their account. They may use more than one account like with his brother or sister name but use his own Payoneer account under all account. If Upwork allow it before then they should notify freelancer that you have to remove all of your payment methods you used other accounts other wise your account will be closed. Finally, my career is not only the main factor in my life it is not like that. I like decipline, pancuality, honesty and so on but in our country non of the are not exist. I really disappointated when I go out of home and see no one follow any rules, everyone doing whatever they want. It is makes my life painful. For all of those reasone I want to leave my country ofcourse not forever also for my next generation who degarve better life.
Basically
I am
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
freelancer and
I work from home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
completed graduation and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
freelancing since 2010. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
10 years I am doing freelancing and I face lots of
Possible spelling mistake found.
obstracal
in the mine time. My
first
common problem is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
payment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
. I have
It seems that an article is missing. Did you mean “the lot of” or “a lot of”?
lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
clients and
A verb seems to be missing. Did you mean “they’re paying”, “they are paying”, or “they were paying”?
they paying
me well
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
under
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketplace
, which is
Possible spelling mistake found.
arrige
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
problem to me. Most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketplace
take 20% of income from every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freelancer
, which is huge amount for us per year.

Secondly
, I know
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
like,
This verb is normally spelled with a hyphen.
Dropshipping
, Affiliate, Lead Generation and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
no,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
main problem is that I am unable to take money from clients or
Possible spelling mistake found.
customars
directly
.
For example
, in the
This verb is normally spelled with a hyphen.
Dropshipping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
I need a legal
Possible spelling mistake found.
paymet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
where every customer can pay for their product
easily
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that I can ship their product.
However
, in our country do not have that kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
payment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I am unable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
even I know that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
well and
I can earn huge amount of money per year.

Thirdly
, working under
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketplace
is too much
Possible spelling mistake found.
painfull
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
Possible spelling mistake found.
undate
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
Possible spelling mistake found.
freaquently
and suspend the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
account
without any notification. Yes, it is
Possible spelling mistake found.
mendatory
to update
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
take any action they should notify all of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freelancers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
stragling
with their career. Every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freelancer
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
amount of money
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they always in panic that when their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
account
will
be closed
.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
upwork
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketplace
over the world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
lead 70% of market share in this area and most of the top
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freelancer
work under
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freelancer
, recently updated a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
that every person's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
payment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
should be
Possible spelling mistake found.
seperate
. Whatever, after updated their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
they closed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
account
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
already earned
Possible spelling mistake found.
handred
thousand of USD under their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
account
. They may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
more than one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
account
like with his brother or sister name
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
Payoneer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
account
under all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
account
. If Upwork
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
then they should notify
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freelancer
that you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
remove all of your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
payment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accounts
This has to be spelled as one word.
other wise
your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
account
will
be closed
.

Finally
, my career is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the main factor in my life it is not like that. I like
Possible spelling mistake found.
decipline
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
pancuality
, honesty and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in our country
Did you mean “none”?
non
of
Did you mean “they are” or “there are”?
the are
not exist. I
really
Possible spelling mistake found.
disappointated
when I go out of home and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
no one follow any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
, everyone
The pronoun ‘everyone’ is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: “does”, “did”.
doing
whatever they want. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
my life painful. For all of those
Possible spelling mistake found.
reasone
I want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
my country
Possible spelling mistake found.
ofcourse
not forever
also
for my
next
generation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
Possible spelling mistake found.
degarve
better life.
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IELTS essay Way I want to go to Canada?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
448 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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