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Universities Should Accept Equal Number Of Male And Female Students In Each Subject v.2

Nowadays, universities are growing and receiving more students every year, due to the increase of tertiary education. Therefore, is common that applicants for the different subjects are whether male or female, in comparison with decades ago, when mostly men attended to education in general. On my opinion, as education is becoming more accessible, and luckily, female rights are more respectable than before, universities should accept every applicant that fill the requirements, despite the gender of the person, so the number of female and male ought to be equal for their subjects. Many people may think that some professions are adequate for only one gender, for example, women are better in the field of education, and men are better for engineering. This is a belief based on the amount of people that follows a career in a determinate field, it is demonstrated that women tend to study subjects related to the humanistic areas, and men follow the mathematics area. Despite of that, this does not mean that this fields must only accept people of the gender that is more common, neither that in their subjects, should provide preference to a gender over the other. Moreover, nowadays is rising the number of women that decide to study on fields related to physics and mathematics, and more men that study on humanistic areas. In consequence, I believe that must not exist a discrimination when accepting applicants to subjects in a career, as the gender does not speak about the intelligence and skills the person has. For instance, in my undergraduate studies, I had classmates that were equally men and women, for a career that belonged to an humanistic area, and both, female and male, had variated abilities that did not related to their gender. In conclusion, every person must have the opportunity to enrol to a subject and have the same probability of being accepted that people of the other gender, because the abilities and skills people have can be seen within the path, and not in advance depending on their gender.
Nowadays, universities are growing and receiving more students every year, due to the increase of tertiary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
Therefore
, is common that applicants for the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
are whether male or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
,
in comparison
with decades ago, when
mostly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
attended to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in general
. On my opinion, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is becoming more accessible, and luckily,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
rights are more respectable than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, universities should accept every applicant that fill the requirements, despite the gender of the person,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
and male ought to be equal for their subjects.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
professions are adequate for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one gender,
for example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
are better in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
are better for engineering. This is a belief based on the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that follows a career in a determinate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
, it
is demonstrated
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
related to the humanistic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
follow the mathematics
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
.
Did you mean “Despite” (or, alternatively, ‘in spite of’)?
Despite of
that, this does not mean that this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fields
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
accept
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of the gender
that is
more common, neither that in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
, should provide preference to a gender over the other.

Moreover
, nowadays is rising the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
that decide to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fields
related to physics and mathematics, and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
on humanistic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. In consequence, I believe that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
not exist a discrimination when accepting applicants to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
in a career, as the gender does not speak about the intelligence and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
the person has.
For instance
, in my undergraduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
, I had classmates that were
equally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
, for a career that belonged to
Use “a” instead of ‘an’ if the following word doesn’t start with a vowel sound, e.g. ‘a sentence’, ‘a university’.
an
humanistic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
, and both,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
and male, had
Possible spelling mistake found.
variated
abilities that did not
The auxiliary verb ‘do’ requires the base form of the verb: “relate”
related
to their gender.

In conclusion
, every person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have the opportunity to enrol to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
and have the same probability of being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of the other gender,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the abilities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
within the path, and not in advance depending on their gender.
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IELTS essay Universities should accept equal number of female and male students in every subject.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
339 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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