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TPO 2: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Always telling the truth is the most important consideration in any relationship between people. v.1

TPO 2: Always telling the truth is the most important consideration in any relationship between people. v. 1
It is no longer news that life exists on other planets aside Earth. It is believed by some scientist that these entities may have a level of intellect and hence, they should be contacted. On the other hand, other scientist are of the view that contacting them is risky. This essay will discuss both views and express an opinion on the best cause of action for mankind. To begin, the idea of reaching out to other planets will help the human race understand her surroundings and neighbours better. Human beings will gain more knowledge about the activities of other entities in the universe and how their activities impact earthlings. In 1906 for example, a group of Astronauts speculated that entities existed on Mars and their activities were responsible for the worsening climatic conditions on earth. In 1956 however, another group of astronauts observed the activities on Mars and they were able to confirm the speculation of the earlier scientist. This discovery led to the formation of the best method for protecting people from the effect of activities if Mars residents. Meanwhile, communication with residents of other planet will automatically alert them of the existence of life on earth if they are not already aware of this. This could lead to serious attacks from aliens who are ever ready to destroy anything that is not like them. In 1965 for example, some aliens were said to have arrived in the US through the route a rocket was deployed to Venus attacking and hijacking equipments of people. In my opinion, I believe it is smarter not to communicate with other residents of the universe because it could lead to attacks from them and loss of lives. In 1907 for example, humans experienced an attack from unidentified flying objects after a drone was sent to Mars for exploration. This occurrence created panic and some lives were lost. In conclusion, while reaching out to aliens may provide insights on our environment, communicating with them may create an awareness of mankind; hence, leading to future attacks. In my opinion, no form of communication should
It is no longer news that life exists on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
planets aside Earth. It
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
scientist that these entities may have a level of intellect and
hence
, they should
be contacted
. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
scientist are of the view that contacting them is risky. This essay will discuss both views and express an opinion on the best cause of action for mankind.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of reaching out to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
planets will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the human race understand her surroundings and
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
better. Human beings will gain more knowledge about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
entities in the universe and how their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
impact earthlings. In 1906
for example
, a group of Astronauts speculated that entities existed on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Mars
and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
were responsible for the worsening climatic conditions on earth. In 1956
however
, another group of astronauts observed the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
on
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
Mars and
they were able to confirm the speculation of the earlier scientist. This discovery led to the formation of the best method for protecting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from the effect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Mars
residents.

Meanwhile, communication with residents of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
planet will
automatically
alert them of the existence of life on earth if they are not already aware of this. This could lead to serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attacks
from aliens who are ever ready to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
anything
that is
not like them. In 1965
for example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
aliens
were said
to have arrived in the US through the route a rocket
was deployed
to Venus attacking and hijacking equipments of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In my opinion, I believe it is smarter not to communicate with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
residents of the universe
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it could lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attacks
from them and loss of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
1907
for example
, humans experienced an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attack
from unidentified flying objects after a drone was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Mars
for exploration. This occurrence created panic and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
were lost
.

In conclusion
, while reaching out to aliens may provide insights on our environment, communicating with them may create an awareness of mankind;
hence
, leading to future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attacks
. In my opinion, no form of communication
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
should
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 2: Always telling the truth is the most important consideration in any relationship between people. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
348 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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