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Today’s society provides people with various ways to lose weight, such as special diets or exercise regimes. Many people believe though that poor food and today’s lifestyle should be addressed first. What is your opinion?

The topic itself defines the area where people are currently in to, IN modern society the chances of getting people to obese state are comparatively high with early days, main factor behind the scenario is people more tend to rely with junk foods. so many article/studies found to be proved well enough to explain the scenario. The increase of restaurants is one of the key areas to get rid out. People are easily busy with daily SCH and current generation are likely to prefer the junk foods because of the taste intensifier added to it. Earlier days, people are preferring to cook themself for any occasions, currently It got moved to restaurants and other party clubs. Out of which almost 99% of restaurants have been using artificial taste intensifier to make the food tastier. Eventually, will end up other disease like cancer, fatty liver and so on. For instance, being considered the development of medical advancement, some disease are quite new in this world and never could be found in order days, especially the COVID 19. . In addition- people are so rush to complete day to day activities and the habitual of people likely to prefer very tasty and easy to cook (tinned foods). Which are extremely harmful to create obese in human Furthermore, perception towards health under current generation are little more conscious than earlier, people are often to prefer exercise and meditation to be part of their life. Today’s world are dodge to be fit, Actors in movies played a vital role to encourage the fitness part in people mind. Enthought it has become habitual that people do exercise and special regimes. Although, Certain percentage will follow special exercise like KETO diet specially to get faster results. It has some negative effect which is not being considered for long term. In conclusion, Exercise and food habit are very important in today’s life, only when its considered for long term.
The topic itself defines the area where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
currently
in to, IN modern society the chances of getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to obese state are
comparatively
high with early days, main factor behind the scenario is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
more tend to
The verb 'to rely' requires the preposition '(up)on': "rely on".
rely
with junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
article/studies found to
be proved
well
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the scenario. The increase of restaurants is one of the key areas to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid out.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are
easily
busy with daily SCH and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
generation are likely to prefer the junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the taste intensifier
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
to it.

Earlier days,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
The verb 'preferring' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
are preferring
to cook
The term is non-standard and not widely accepted.
themself
for any occasions,
currently
It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to restaurants and other party clubs. Out of which almost 99% of restaurants have been using artificial taste intensifier to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
tastier.
Eventually
, will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up other disease like cancer, fatty liver and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
For instance
,
being considered
the development of medical advancement,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "diseases"?
disease
are quite new in this world and never could
be found
in order days,
especially
the
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
COVID 19
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
In addition
-
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
rush to complete
It appears that two hyphens are missing.
day to day
activities and the habitual of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
likely to prefer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
tasty and easy to cook (tinned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods)
. Which are
extremely
harmful to create obese in human

Furthermore
, perception towards health under
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
generation are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
more conscious than earlier,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
to prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
and meditation to be part of their life.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
’s world are dodge to
be fit
, Actors in movies played a vital role to encourage the fitness part in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
mind.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Enthought
it has become habitual that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
and special regimes.
“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
, Certain percentage will follow special
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
like KETO diet
specially
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
faster results. It has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect which is not
being considered
for long term.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Exercise
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
habit are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s life,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
when its considered for long term.
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IELTS essay Today’s society provides people with various ways to lose weight, such as special diets or exercise regimes. Many people believe though that poor food and today’s lifestyle should be addressed first. What is your opinion?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
322 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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