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Today, people can work and live anywhere they want, because of the improvement of communication technology and transport. Do advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Today, people can work and live anywhere they want, because of the improvement of communication technology and transport. Do advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? 9L7DX
With the advent of internet, networking technology and advancements in transportation the life of employees have simplified. I agree that these improvements have enabled employees to work and live in any corner of the world and still remain in employers reach, but there are few drawbacks too. In this essay, I will discuss both sides of the arguments and support the former view. To begin with, there is drastic improvement in communication across the world. This is because, of introduction of free voice calls and video calls by the networks providers. For example, networks like Jio, Airtel are providing free voice calls to any other network, so nor the employees working from home or the employers have to worry about telephone bills. In addition, if an entire team wants to discuss about project kick off and task distribution that practicability could be offered by a software applications, such as skype thus, creating an aura of a meeting room, where direct conversations could be held. Furthermore, other advancement which has been an asset to modern era is transportation. The reason for this are trams, trains, cars and flights which have reduced the travelling time by exponentional number of hours. For instance, now an employee can virtually attend a morning meeting in Delhi, noon meet Mumbai and meeting over dinner in Calcutta. In addition to this, travelling to a different time zone to monitor work status and return the same day is also possible because of fast travel modes like flights. Conversely, the major drawback with communication technology is that some employer might call or drop an urgent mail without taking employee leisure time into consideration. Another downside, employees will find it difficult to have a good rapport with each other. This should be manager’s responsibility to overcome these drawbacks. In conclusion, although employees will face some issues with the advancement in technology as employers might drop the work at any point of the day, I believe that the working at your own schedule will keep employees motivated and satisfied as their work-life balance will be fulfilling.
With the advent of internet, networking technology and advancements in transportation the life of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
have simplified. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that these improvements have enabled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
to work and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in any corner of the world and
still
remain in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employers
reach,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there are few drawbacks too. In this essay, I will discuss both sides of the arguments and support the former view.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there is drastic improvement in communication across the world. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, of introduction of free voice
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
and video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
by the networks providers.
For example
, networks like
Possible spelling mistake found.
Jio
, Airtel are providing free voice
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
to any other network,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
nor the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
working from home or the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
worry about telephone bills.
In addition
, if an entire team wants to
Did you mean simply "discuss project"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about project
kick off and task distribution that practicability could
be offered
by a software applications, such as skype
thus
, creating an aura of a meeting room, where direct conversations could
be held
.
Furthermore
, other advancement which has been an asset to modern era is transportation. The reason for this are trams, trains, cars and flights which have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
the travelling time by
Possible spelling mistake found.
exponentional
number of hours.
For instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
can
virtually
attend a morning meeting in Delhi, noon
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
Mumbai and meeting over dinner in Calcutta.
In addition
to this, travelling to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
time zone to monitor work status and return the same day is
also
possible
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
travel modes like flights.

Conversely
, the major drawback with communication technology is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employer
might
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
call
or drop an urgent mail without taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
leisure time into consideration. Another downside,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
will find it difficult to have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
rapport with each other. This should be manager’s responsibility to overcome these drawbacks.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
will face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
issues with the advancement in technology as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employers
might drop the work at any point of the day, I believe that the working at your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
schedule will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
motivated and satisfied as their work-life balance will be fulfilling.
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IELTS essay Today, people can work and live anywhere they want, because of the improvement of communication technology and transport. Do advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
345 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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