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Today more people are travelling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of traveling for the traveler?

Nowadays, people travel overseas more than previous years due to the improved communication system as a result, they get some refreshments for their mental health. To begin with, transportation system was the major obstacle for the travelers in past. As a result, people lose their interest on travelling. But now, by using advanced technology, this sector has gain lot of improvements. Time was the vital issue for traveler. Previously, it took long time to travel and also the cost was very high. People were not capable to bear this traveling expenses. For example, in 1990, it took almost 16 hours to travel USA by air but now it takes only 6 hours from Bangladesh and the fair was also lower than previous. On the other hand, people also get some benefits from visiting a new place. In our city life, people always live a hectic life and do not manage extra time for their family as well as for themselves to travel around the world. They got exhausted by doing the same things again and again. But when they get chance to visit, they feel excited by thinking that they will spend some quality time with their family and also get some mental rest. People, those who do the job in private sector, need mental refreshment. For instance, a study conducted by The Journal of Visitor Association, showed that about 90% of private job holder needs mental refreshment and among them about 85% travel each year. In conclusion, the number of travelers increase due to the cost effective and time consumed communication system. And visitors take this opportunity to make themselves happy and healthy.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
overseas more than previous years due to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
communication system
as a result
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
refreshments for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
health.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, transportation system was the major obstacle for the travelers
Did you mean: "in the past"?
in past
.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lose their interest on travelling.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, by using advanced technology, this sector has gain lot of improvements.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Time
was the vital issue for traveler. Previously, it took long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
and
also
the cost was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
high.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
were not capable to bear this traveling expenses.
For example
, in 1990, it took almost 16 hours to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
USA by air
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
it takes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
6 hours from Bangladesh and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
was
also
lower than previous.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits from visiting a new place. In our city life,
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people
always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a hectic life and do not manage extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for their family
as well
as for themselves to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
around the world. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
exhausted by doing the same things again and again.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
chance to visit, they feel excited by thinking that they will spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their family and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
rest.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
, those who do the job in private sector, need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
refreshment.
For instance
, a study conducted by The Journal of Visitor Association,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that about 90% of private job holder needs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
refreshment and among them about 85%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
each year.

In conclusion
, the number of travelers increase due to the cost effective and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
consumed communication system. And visitors take this opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
themselves happy and healthy.
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IELTS essay Today more people are travelling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of traveling for the traveler?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
274 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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