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To what extent do you agree that punishment is an acceptable method to distinguish for children between what is right and wrong. What are other measures

To what extent do you agree that punishment is an acceptable method to distinguish for children between what is right and wrong. What are other measures oRGAX
Punishing children physically in order to teach them what is right and what is wrong is considered a necessity by many people. Although this might sound reasonable, I strongly disagree because it creates fear and builds up negative attributes in their mindsets. Understandably, those that support corporal punishment feel that it serves as an immediate deterrent to children’s misconduct. If a child is flogged for stealing, for example, he or she is unlikely to commit such crime again. Because of this, they say this style is required to correct a child from going astray. However, I would argue that this form of correction causes more harm than good to children. These youngsters tend to develop a lack of confidence due to fear that results from spanking, which makes it difficult for them to interact with their peers. Recent research conducted in France revealed a positive correlation between personality disorder and physical correction. Therefore, this approach can have negative consequences when they become adults. Furthermore, beating a child to symbolize wrongdoing appears to send a wrong signal that, it is acceptable to beat a fellow human being. They might carry this feeling in their primitive minds in to their adulthood. A particularly good illustration is Canada, where parents raised from abusive homes turn to violent people, inflicting injuries on their families. As a result, a vicious cycle of a violent world is created, which could potentially lead to loss of lives and disabilities. In conclusion, I totally disagree that physically beating a child is the ideal way to bring them up owing to the fact that it leads to low self-esteem and it connotes a dangerous mentality. It is my hope that parents and teachers would embrace other alternatives to achieve this aim.
Punishing children
physically
in order to teach them what is right and what is
wrong
is considered
a necessity by
many
people
. Although this might sound reasonable, I
strongly
disagree
because
it creates fear and builds up
negative
attributes in their mindsets.

Understandably
, those that support corporal punishment feel that it serves as an immediate deterrent to children’s misconduct. If a
child
is flogged
for stealing,
for example
, he or she is unlikely to commit such crime again.
Because of this
, they say this style
is required
to correct a
child
from going astray.

However
, I would argue that this form of correction causes more harm than
good
to children. These youngsters tend to develop a lack of confidence due to fear that results from spanking, which
makes
it difficult for them to interact with their peers. Recent research conducted in France revealed a
positive
correlation between personality disorder and physical correction.
Therefore
, this approach can have
negative
consequences when they become adults.

Furthermore
, beating a
child
to symbolize wrongdoing appears to
send
a
wrong
signal that, it is acceptable to beat a fellow human being. They might carry this feeling in their primitive minds in to their adulthood. A
particularly
good
illustration is Canada, where parents raised from abusive homes turn to violent
people
, inflicting injuries on their families.
As a result
, a vicious cycle of a violent world
is created
, which could
potentially
lead to loss of
lives
and disabilities.

In conclusion
, I
totally
disagree that
physically
beating a
child
is the ideal way to bring them up owing to the fact that it leads to low self-esteem and it connotes a
dangerous
mentality. It is my hope that parents and teachers would embrace other alternatives to achieve this aim.
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IELTS essay To what extent do you agree that punishment is an acceptable method to distinguish for children between what is right and wrong. What are other measures

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
292 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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