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The pros and cons of competition

The pros and cons of competition YwRxd
Many people believe that competition is a pathway in which resounding success can be achieved. However, some advantages and disadvantages are defined for that and in this assay, I will articulate some of competition advantages and major challenges about that. First, friendly competition plays radical role in promotion of one’s quality life, namely, regardless of what happens it is a unique trigger in overcoming to obstacles in one way. Second, sometimes it unravels channel of communication for competitors, scilicet with fulfilling their potential in competition court producing or reproducing of best products is possible. However, some foibles were mentioned for competition and against all acclamation it is subject to severe criticism. First, sometimes competition is harmful for one who cannot withstand rival prosperity especially when he/she goes from strength to strength in intense competition, on the other hand setbacks make motives of vengeance. Second, competition especially between two prosperous authorities is accompanied with some adventures videlicet (to wit), uprooting of millions people following huge war, capturing of other planet are outcomes of this unsafe competition. Conclusion To conclude, most people are used to come in competitive courses. This attempt is exposed of some advantages and disadvantages. In my opinion its disadvantages outweigh the advantages, underestimating of human life, tracing of unabsorbing routes for dominating her/his opponent, are additional disadvantages of that.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
is a pathway in which resounding success can
be achieved
.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
and disadvantages
are defined
for that and in this assay, I will articulate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
and major challenges about that.

First
, friendly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
plays radical role in promotion of one’s quality life,
namely
, regardless of what happens it is a unique trigger in overcoming to obstacles in one way.

Second,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
it unravels channel of communication for competitors, scilicet with fulfilling their potential in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
court producing or reproducing
A determiner is probably missing here: "of the best".
of best
products is possible.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
foibles
were mentioned
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
and against all acclamation it is subject to severe criticism.

First
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
is harmful for one who cannot withstand rival prosperity
especially
when he/she goes from strength to strength in intense
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
,
on the other hand
setbacks
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
motives of vengeance.

Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
especially
between two prosperous authorities is
The usual collocation for "accompany" is "by," not "with." It is better to say this: "accompanied by".
accompanied with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
adventures videlicet (to wit), uprooting of millions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
following huge war, capturing of other planet are outcomes of this unsafe competition.

Conclusion

To conclude
, most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
in competitive courses. This attempt
is exposed
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
and disadvantages. In my opinion its disadvantages outweigh the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
, underestimating of human life, tracing of
Possible spelling mistake found.
unabsorbing
routes for dominating her/his opponent, are additional disadvantages of that.
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IELTS essay The pros and cons of competition

Essay
  American English
7 paragraphs
221 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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