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The Ordovician period is a geologic period that occurred around 440-485 million years ago and lasted for approximately 45 million years. During this time period the oceans teemed with life. Life on land was still in the early stages of diversification. Th

The Ordovician period is a geologic period that occurred around 440-485 million years ago and lasted for approximately 45 million years. During this time period the oceans teemed with life. Life on land was still in the early stages of diversification. Th Aja1M
In the reading passage, three main theories are explained which are the reasons for the mass extinction of marine life at the end of the Ordovician period. But in the lecture, these reasons are contradicted by giving other three contradictory reasons for each. In reading it is mentioned that due to the climate change ice sheets were formed which caused the sea level to drop by 100m and due to that habitat of species destroyed in the shallow oceans. But in the lecture, the contradictory reason is mentioned, like the creation of ice sheets took several years near about 700 years the ice age is formed and ocean species get enough time to adapt the environment. Therefore it is not possible that ice sheets are responsible for mass extinction. The second theory is mentioned in the reading passage is that meteorite caused mass extinction. The dust was created which is responsible for blocking the sun. And most of the animals were depended on the sunlight. But it is not true according to the lecture as it is not possible to cover the sun completely. The third theory in the reading passage is super UV rays. The sun's ultraviolet rays were very strong to kill the marine organisms who live in the ocean surface. According to the lecture, it is not possible to learn about the animals from fossils that they live on the ocean surface and not deep into the sea. So, in conclusion, we can say that the theories which are considered in the reading passage on the basis of evidence are false because the relation between evidence and the situation is considered wrongly as per the lecture, therefore, false theories were made.
In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
, three main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
theories
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
which are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
for the mass extinction of marine life at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the Ordovician period.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lecture
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
are contradicted
by giving other three contradictory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
for each.

In
The comma is probably missing here: "reading, it".
reading it
is mentioned
that due to the climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
ice sheets
were formed
which caused the sea level to drop by
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "100 m"
100m
and due to that habitat of species
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
in the shallow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
oceans
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lecture
, the contradictory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is mentioned
, like the creation of ice sheets took several years near about 700 years the ice age
is formed
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ocean
species
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to adapt the environment.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
it is not possible that ice sheets are responsible for mass extinction.

The second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
theory
is mentioned
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
is that meteorite caused mass extinction. The dust
was created
which is responsible for blocking the sun. And most of the animals
were depended
on the sunlight.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it is not true according to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lecture
as it is not possible to cover the sun completely.

The third
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
theory
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
is super UV rays. The sun's ultraviolet rays were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
strong to kill the marine organisms who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ocean
surface. According to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lecture
, it is not possible to learn about the animals from fossils that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ocean
surface and not deep into the sea.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
in conclusion
, we can say that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
theories
which
are considered
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
on the basis of evidence are false
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the relation between evidence and the situation
is considered
wrongly
as per the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lecture
,
therefore
, false
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
theories
were made
.
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IELTS essay The Ordovician period is a geologic period that occurred around 440-485 million years ago and lasted for approximately 45 million years. During this time period the oceans teemed with life. Life on land was still in the early stages of diversification. Th

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
284 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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