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The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing 5VPm
In this age of transformation, the widespread use of e-commerce triggers a heated debate- ‘whether it will lead to the closure of all shops in towns and cities in the foreseeable future’. In the case, I partially accord with the notion. The upcoming paragraphs will cast light on factors in favour of both online and offline shopping. To commence with, online shopping is accelerating dramatically. There are several reasons in favour of this phenomenon. The most prominent one is that cutting edge technology offers a better lifestyle in an unprecedented fashion. In simple words, people can buy anything they need around the clock with the touch of a button and the product will be delivered directly to their front door. For example, a couple of months ago I purchased a smartphone from wayfair. com, an e-commerce shop, in five minutes and got 15% discounts in addition to free shipping and a coupon. Apart from it, most cases online shops provide consumers with an astonishing range of products. Besides, it is relatively easy to navigate and to purchase products from all over the globe. These facilities will definitely force many businesses to go online and many to close. Having said that, there will still be a buoyant demand for street stores or supermalls in the future. This is because a fair number of shoppers still want a more tactile shopping experience. In simple words, consumers will want to see, touch, and feel the products before purchasing. This way, not only do they get a tangible experience, but also can take products home instantaneously. A very good example here is my uncles and parents. They always prefer in-stores fruits purchase so that they can check the freshness. In conclusion, physical shops bear the burnt of the tremendous growth in online shopping of-late. Nevertheless, in-stores will not be rendered obsolete and will remain crucial to the shoppers due to its signature advantages
In this age of transformation, the widespread
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of e-commerce triggers a heated debate- ‘whether it will lead to the closure of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
in towns and cities in the foreseeable future’. In the case, I
partially
accord with the notion. The upcoming paragraphs will cast light on factors in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
and offline shopping.

To commence with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
shopping is accelerating
dramatically
. There are several reasons in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of this phenomenon. The most prominent one is that cutting edge technology offers a better lifestyle
Consider replacing "in an unprecedented fashion" with the adverb for "unprecedented"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in an unprecedented fashion
. In simple words,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
anything they need around the clock with the touch of a button and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
will
be delivered
directly
to their front door.
For example
, a couple of months ago I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
a smartphone from
Possible spelling mistake found.
wayfair
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
com
, an e-commerce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
, in five minutes and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
15% discounts
in addition
to free shipping and a coupon. Apart from it, most cases
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
provide consumers with an astonishing range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
Besides
, it is
relatively
easy to navigate and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
from all over the globe. These facilities will definitely force
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
businesses to go
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
to close.

Having said that, there will
still
be a buoyant demand for street stores or
Possible spelling mistake found.
supermalls
in the future. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
number of shoppers
still
want a more tactile shopping experience. In simple words, consumers will want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, touch, and feel the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
purchasing. This way, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
do they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a tangible experience,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
can take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
home
instantaneously
. A
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example here is my uncles and parents. They always prefer in-stores fruits
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
the freshness.

In conclusion
, physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
bear
The phrase 'the burnt of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'the' and 'of'.
the burnt of
the tremendous growth in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
shopping of-late.
Nevertheless
, in-stores will not
be rendered
obsolete and will remain crucial to the shoppers due to its signature advantages
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IELTS essay The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
318 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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