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The following appeared in a memorandum from the manager of KNOW radio station Several factors indicate that KNOW radio can no longer succeed as a rock and roll music station Consider for example that the number of people in our listening area over fifty y

The following appeared in a memorandum from the manager of KNOW radio station Several factors indicate that KNOW radio can no longer succeed as a rock and roll music station Consider for example that the number of people in our listening area over fifty y qVQKp
In this passage, the author recommends switching KNOW radio from rock-and-roll music to 24-hour news, because it will allow the station to attract major predicted listeners in this district for the sake of guaranteeing profits. To support his/her claim, the author cites a list of information to prove the fade of rock-and-roll music and potential of news publication. Quite reasonable though such recommendation appears at first glance, there exists several questions regarding his/her reasoning that requires further analysis. Thus, the author's conclusion could end up being pretty compelling or invalid in the end, depending on the answers to the questions. To start off, the author's reasoning heavily relies on whether or not audiences over fifty years old in a robust increasing trend could comprise majority of target customers of KNOW radio station, a question that is not yet answered. It is likely that such elder group mightn't be the main focus for radio station, because the absolute number of such group is very minuscule compared with the total audience number. Without additional information to evaluate its percentage among the overall population and detailed information about their interests in future, it is of equal likelihood that elder audiences could keep the enthusiasm as time goes by. Both of those two phenomena could seriously challenge the author's viewpoint about importance of elder group and render his/her claim much less advisable. On the contrary, any valid proof that such group actually keep their mania for radio group and contribute to majority of target customers in KNOW radio station could strengthen his/her reasoning. Granted that elder group is the target for KNOW's focus and given the fact that music's sales status in local market, whether rock-and-roll music has diminished their attraction for local residents needs a second look. The probability that music store's reports might be biased must be considered and addressed. Yet, if the author could unequivocally demonstrate that such stores vividly reveal the truth and such prediction is applied for the raido music as well, his/her reasoning will gain more weights. Furthermore, another question that requires our deliberation is whether the neighouring cities' upsurging new stations could be refered for KNOW case. While other cites has geological vincity, the probability that such nearby location mightn't lead to similiar taste of local resident could not be excluded in advance. For example, people in KNOW's district might differentiate from those in another cities. Thus, we have no clues whether successful stories of another cites could be used in KNOW without any problem. If no, the author's viewpoint is unlikely to make more audiences for KNOW station. Last but not least, while we can acknowledge for a moment that all of aforementioned questions cling to support the author's idea, it remains to be seen whether resorting to news couldn't impact original audience of KNOW. If such suggestion lead to great loss of previous major audience, this is doubtful that it could inevitably increase total audience and help profits in future. In summary, while turning to news for KNOW's broadcasting might attract more elder people as its audience, this is a conclusion that we cannot derive from the information available in the argument. Furthermore, even if elder people is KNOW's target candidates, the efficiency of such proposal is still built upon implications, which are open to different probabilities. Only after the aforementioned questions are adequately addressed can we effectively evaluate such recommendation and reach a logically sound conclusion.
In this passage, the author recommends switching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KNOW
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
radio
from rock-and-roll
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
to 24-hour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
station
to attract major predicted listeners in this district for the sake of guaranteeing profits. To support
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
his/her
claim, the author cites a list of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
to prove the fade of rock-and-roll
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and potential of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
publication. Quite reasonable though such recommendation appears at
first
glance, there exists several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
questions
regarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
his/her
reasoning that requires
further
analysis.
Thus
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author's
conclusion could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up being pretty compelling or invalid in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, depending on the answers to the questions.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
off, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author's
reasoning
heavily
relies on
Consider shortening this phrase to just "whether". It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
whether or not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
audiences
over fifty years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
in a robust increasing trend could comprise
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
target
customers of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KNOW
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
radio
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
station
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
question
that is
not
yet
answered. It is likely that such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elder
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
mightn't be the main focus for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
radio
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
station
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the absolute number of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
minuscule compared with the total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
audience
number. Without additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
to evaluate its percentage among the
overall
population and detailed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
about their interests
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
, it is of equal likelihood that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elder
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
audiences
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the enthusiasm as time goes by. Both of those two phenomena could
seriously
challenge the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author's
viewpoint about importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elder
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
and render
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
his/her
claim much less advisable.
On the contrary
, any valid proof that such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
actually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their mania for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
radio
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
and contribute to
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
target
customers in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KNOW
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
radio
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
station
could strengthen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
his/her
reasoning.

Granted that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elder
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
target
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KNOW's
focus and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the fact that music's sales status in local market, whether rock-and-roll
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
has diminished their attraction for local residents needs a second look. The probability that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
store's reports might
be biased
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be considered
and addressed.
Yet
, if the author could
unequivocally
demonstrate that such stores
vividly
reveal the truth and such prediction
is applied
for the
Possible spelling mistake found.
raido
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
as well
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
his/her
reasoning will gain more weights.

Furthermore
, another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
question
that requires our deliberation is whether the
Possible spelling mistake found.
neighouring
cities' upsurging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stations
could be
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "referred", the past tense form of the verb 'refer'?
refered
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KNOW
case. While other cites has geological
Possible spelling mistake found.
vincity
, the probability that such nearby location mightn't lead to
Possible spelling mistake found.
similiar
taste of local resident could not
be excluded
in advance.
For example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KNOW's
district might differentiate from those in another cities.
Thus
, we have no clues whether successful stories of another cites could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KNOW
without any problem. If no, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author's
viewpoint is unlikely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
audiences
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KNOW
station.

Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, while we can acknowledge for a moment that all of aforementioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
questions
cling to support the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
, it remains to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
whether resorting to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
couldn't impact original
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
audience
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KNOW
. If such suggestion lead to great loss of previous major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
audience
, this is doubtful that it could
inevitably
increase total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
audience
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
profits
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
.

In summary, while turning to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KNOW's
broadcasting might attract more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elder
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
as its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
audience
, this is a conclusion that we cannot derive from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
available in the argument.
Furthermore
, even if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elder
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KNOW's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
target
candidates, the efficiency of such proposal is
still
built upon implications, which are open to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
probabilities.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
after the aforementioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
questions
are
adequately
addressed can we
effectively
evaluate such recommendation and reach a
logically
sound conclusion.
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IELTS essay The following appeared in a memorandum from the manager of KNOW radio station Several factors indicate that KNOW radio can no longer succeed as a rock and roll music station Consider for example that the number of people in our listening area over fifty y

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
572 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • The following appeared in a memorandum from the manager of KNOW radio station Several factors indicate that KNOW radio can no longer succeed as a rock and roll music station Consider for example that the number of people in our listening area over fifty y