Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The continued rise in the world's population is the greatest problem faced by the humanity at the present time. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

The current world population is 7 billion people. The countries that have largest population are China, followed by India. The world population has risen due to improved medical health care and reduced infant mortality rates. The rise in population has different reasons depending on the country and the cultural factors that prevail in the societies. As mentioned earlier, development in the health and medical areas has dipped the infant and maternal mortality rates around the world. This effect can be seen even in developing and under developing countries. Having a child also is a cultural norm in many societies across the Asia and Africa. A family is considered to be complete only when the couple has a child. There is a great important given to continuing one's lineage and legacy of the family. But, on the other hand, if the population growth of a country is taken lightly then it can have grave impacts especially on the environment. Increasing population means more amount of food and resources like coal, fuel, education, medical, etc. This means that it can put a great amount of pressure on the government to provide these services. The need for greater resources also includes destruction of environment like cutting of forest areas to build dams, housing areas, etc. The rise of population will impact the environment severely. In my opinion, the greatest problem faced by humanity is not increasing population but it is the destruction of the environment. Masses need to realise the importance of the environment. If we destroy the environment, we may not have food and other resources. Destruction of environment can lead to various diseases and outbreaks that we have seen in the current years. Governments, International organisations, activists and the masses need to come together to save the planet from further damage.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
is 7 billion
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
that have
A determiner is probably missing here: “the largest”.
largest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
are China, followed by India. The world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
has risen due to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
medical health care and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
infant mortality rates. The rise in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
reasons depending on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and the cultural factors that prevail in the societies. As mentioned earlier, development in the health and medical areas has dipped the infant and maternal mortality rates around the world. This effect can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
even in developing and under developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. Having a child
also
is a cultural norm in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
societies across the Asia and Africa. A family
is considered
to be complete
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
when the couple has a child. There is a great
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to continuing one's lineage and legacy of the family.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
,
on the other hand
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
growth of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is taken
lightly
then it can have grave impacts
especially
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
. Increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
means more amount of food and resources like coal, fuel, education, medical, etc. This means that it can put a great amount of pressure on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to provide these services. The need for greater resources
also
includes destruction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
like cutting of forest areas to build dams, housing areas, etc. The rise of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
will impact the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
severely
. In my opinion, the greatest problem faced by humanity is not increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is the destruction of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
. Masses need to
Possible spelling mistake. ‘realise’ is British English.
realise
the importance of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
. If we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
, we may not have food and other resources. Destruction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
can lead to various diseases and outbreaks that we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
years.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Governments
, International
Possible spelling mistake. ‘organisations’ is British English.
organisations
, activists and the masses need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
together to save the planet from
further
damage.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay The continued rise in the world's population is the greatest problem faced by the humanity at the present time. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
300 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts